Five Crap Pop Hits Worse Than Rebecca Black's "Friday"

Six million of you have already endured it. Gawker asked if it was "the worst music video ever." Meanwhile, foreign press like The Sydney Morning Herald wonders why it has overtaken the Japanese earthquake and tsunami devastation on Twitter.

Of course, we're talking about the gone-viral-for-all-the-wrong-reasons video of unknown Rebecca Black's "Friday." In the song, she muses on which seat in a car should she occupy, gives us a lesson on the days of the week (Saturday comes after Friday, in case you were wondering), and delivers an odd pronunciation of the word Friday, sounding something like "Fry-dai."

Add to that a frozen expression of elation, an odd rap break, and a creepy Los Angeles label who seems to do this sort of thing all the time, and you can see why the world is captivated with Black.

But is it really the worse song ever produced? Is it any different than all the other crap that the music industry is continually churning out? Let us make the case on behalf of Black, starting with the offending video.

5. Lady Gaga's "Born This Way"

Say what you will about Black, at least she doesn't base her entire (short) career on someone else's work. Lady Gaga continues to rip off acts like Madonna, Grace Jones, ABBA, Ace of Base, Björk, Peaches, and more. And we continue to forgive her because she's "so original."

4. Britney Spears's "I Love Rock 'n' Roll"

Britney Spears has a habit of butchering other people's work. First, it was Sonny & Cher's "Beat Goes On," then the Rolling Stones' "Satisfaction," and quite possibly the most offending was her cover of "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" by Joan Jett & the Blackhearts. The original version was sexy in a bitch-that-might-beat-you-up sort of way. The world wouldn't know how crazy Spears actually was until a few years later.

3. Jessie J's "Do It Like A Dude"

You know what's worse than Katy Perry? A cheap Katy Perry knock-off.

2. Black Eyed Peas's "Boom Boom Pow"

Really, we could have picked anything created by these unapologetic pop foursome. There's been plenty of cringe-worthy lyrics, particularly since Fergie joined in 2003. But when "Boom Boom Pow" hit the airwaves, we thought there was no way in hell the American public would put up with them any longer. We were wrong.

1. Aqua's "Barbie Girl"

You, America, pushed this song to the number seven spot on the Billboard Hot 100 back when it was a lot harder to top the charts. That means several of you went into an actual physical music store and purchased an actual physical copy of Aqua's mega-hit. Nuff said.

We're not saying Rebecca Black's "Friday" is any better than these tracks. But we are a nation that loves bad pop music, as we've pointed out above.

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Jose D. Duran is the associate editor of Miami New Times. He's the strategist behind the publication's eyebrow-raising Facebook and Twitter feeds. He has also been reporting on Miami's cultural scene since 2006. He has a BS in journalism and will live in Miami as long as climate change permits.
Contact: Jose D. Duran