Where to Find the Best Strip Club Food in Miami

If you’re reading this story right now, you’re probably doing so out of pure curiosity or planning to share it immediately in your group chat, but hear us out. Miami’s strip clubs are absolutely legendary. Rap songs exalt them, locals argue about which one is the best, and some of them even double as nightclubs. Still, we rarely talk about the secondary draw to these beloved cultural institutions — their kitchens.

Let’s not forget that Miami was just named the no. 1 foodie city in the United States, so it’s not a stretch to imagine that the Magic City’s adult cabarets are satisfying more than one kind of appetite. If eating a meal while watching a fully nude performance (or experiencing one on your lap) sounds unappetizing, all we’re saying is, don’t knock it until you try it. Below, check out the six best strip clubs in Miami to get your grub on — and a show.

BT’s Gentlemen’s Club – What to Order: Pizza

BT’s Gentleman’s Club (or Booby Trap, to the OG fans) has multiple locations throughout South Florida, and its South Miami kitchen delivers late-night eats to famished guests — sometimes, even unsuspecting UM kids who order via Uber Eats from “BT’s Bar & Grill.” One New Times writer fondly remembers BT’s pizza as her college-era late-night snack of choice, but she didn’t realize it came from a strip club until she went to pick it up in person. If that isn’t an endorsement of the food quality, we don’t know what is. 5922 S. Dixie Hwy., South Miami; 305-663-4567; myboobytrap.com.

Cheetah Hallandale Beach – What to Order: Prime Rib

Cheetah Gentleman’s Club in Hallandale Beach is an institution, and it rewards the community for its loyalty with a free lunch every day until 3 p.m. In this economy, who can afford not to drop in for a hearty lunch with a side of eye candy? Those who think that sounds too good to be true haven’t tried their Wednesday prime rib special, which is cooked to perfection and served by the same executive chef behind Tootsie’s and Scarlett’s. Editor’s note: If you’re coming for a freebie, please keep it respectful — don’t forget to tip your server and the dancers. 100 Ansin Blvd., Hallandale Beach; 954-455-2131; cheetahhallandale.com.

Gold Rush Cabaret – What to Order: Chicken Tenders

The debate over the best strip clubs in town rivals the debate over the best chicken tenders, and Gold Rush is a solid contender for both accolades. With three floors and 15,000 square feet of club space, fans of the fully nude establishment come here to kick back, catch a UFC fight, and refuel with tender, golden homestyle chicken tenders served with a side of hickory barbecue sauce, blue cheese, and a choice of fries. Legend has it that when it comes to Miami, even the bros in Ibiza can agree on three things: Club Space, beaches, and Gold Rush tendies. P.S. – You can also find these chicken tenders at E11even. You’re welcome. 7770 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; 305-631-2564; goldrushcabaret.com.

Scarlett’s Cabaret – What to Order: Lamb Chops

We can forgive Scarlett’s for calling itself the “No. 1 strip club in Miami,” when it’s clearly in Broward, because the women are beautiful and the food is top-notch. Guests here can order from the more casual Scarlett’s menu or from the adjacent high-end restaurant, Rick’s Steakhouse & Lounge, which serves prime cuts of meat and classic steakhouse sides. Both menus offer the fan favorite: a half-rack of Colorado lamb chops, seared and grilled to your taste. If, for some reason, you’re not in the mood for naked ladies as a backdrop to your steak dinner, Rick’s has a separate entrance that doesn’t connect with the cabaret. We’re not saying you should host your grandma’s 80th birthday there, but we’re also not saying you shouldn’t. 2920 SW 30th Ave., Hallandale Beach; 954-455-8318; scarlettscabaret.com.

Stir Crazy – What to Order: Churrasco

Stir Crazy is a legendary Pinecrest strip club that was built in 1955, decades before Pinecrest was officially incorporated in 1996. Over the years, it has gained an almost mythical reputation not just for its longevity, but for serving what many locals swear is the best churrasco in town. One Reddit reviewer even mused, “I know they have the best churrasco in town. Is that what keeps them alive? What is their secret? Because the girls weren’t particularly special.” The combination of its old-school charm, unlikely culinary excellence, and deep roots in local history has made Stir Crazy a true Pinecrest icon. 12425 S. Dixie Hwy., Miami; 305-233-4432; instagram.com/stircrazysg.

Tootsie’s – What to Order: Fried Lobster Tail with Rice

The biggest strip club in South Florida was once home to a BJ’s Wholesale Club (groceries, not the other thing) and has continued the former tenant’s legacy as a one-stop shop. Regulars here are quick to tell you that Tootsie’s Cabaret has the sexiest ladies, the steamiest VIP rooms, and the most satisfying… fried lobster with seafood rice. Patrons are passionate about Tootsie’s culinary offerings across the board (the salads are a great option for those watching their caloric intake), but there’s a reason that its lobster is hailed as “World famous” on the menu. 150 NW 183rd St., Miami; 305-651-5822; tootsiescabaret.com.