Dear Marco Rubio: Shut the Fuck Up About “the Media” Already

Last night, journalists at the Annapolis Capital Gazette put out a damn newspaper a few hours after a gunman stormed their newsroom and murdered five of their colleagues. It was an act of brave defiance that stood in eloquent contrast to President Trump’s repeated claims that journalists are “enemies of the people.”

Miami Marlins Midseason Report Card: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

The Major League Baseball season just passed the midway point, and as far as the Marlins’ record is concerned, there hasn’t been any great surprise: The Fish are dead last in the NL East. Sadly, there have been no miracles or Cinderella stories thus far for the Marlins. They’re a straight-up bad baseball team. As most observers expected, there is no getting around the fact that 2018 will not be the year the Marlins break their 15-year playoff drought.

Vegas Is Wrong: Adam Gase Won’t Be Fired This Season

We’re beginning to think Las Vegas just isn’t a fan of the 2018 Miami Dolphins. First, they peg the Fins with one of the lowest over-under numbers in the NFL; now they’ve taken it a step further and placed Adam Gase as the second-to-likeliest coach in the NFL to be fired this season — not cool, Vegas!

The Republican Führer Donald Trump Commits His Most Evil Act Yet

For a minute, it looked as if Donald Trump might evolve into a humanitarian. He commuted the life sentence without parole of Alice Johnson, a 63-year-old black woman convicted of a nonviolent drug crimes. He also announced support for the First Step Act, a bipartisan bill that would allocate $50 million a year to several prison reform programs. He even suggested he would back legislation making marijuana legal.

One in Four Miamians Are Cool With Trump Ripping Children Away From Their Parents

If you haven’t taken five minutes to listen to the audio published yesterday of young children screaming in terror and begging for their parents while a Border Patrol agent laughs at them, it’s your duty as an American to hear it. This is the United States in 2018, where President Trump’s official policy is to rip kids away from their parents and lock them in cages.

Udonis Haslem Should Take His Talents to China

Udonis Haslem wants to continue playing basketball. Confirmed. You can forget about him hanging it up. Return all of those golf clubs and fishing lure retirement gifts — he’ll be putting on a jersey next season. Which jersey Udonis dons, though, is a surprising story now. Even more surprising is the fact that his jersey could belong to a team in China, Europe, or any another country overseas.

Bible-Quoting Marco Rubio Defends Trump’s Inhumane Child-Separation Policy

This weekend, prominent Catholic leaders such as Cardinal Timothy Dolan and Miami Archbishop Thomas Wenski took aim at President Trump’s directive to rip children away from their parents at the border. One top Jesuit called the policy, under which Border Patrol agents have locked hundreds of children in cages, “pure evil” and “wantonly cruel.”

The Miami Heat Should Pass on the LeBron James Sweepstakes

Now that the NBA season is over, the LeBron James free-agency watch has begun. Every team will be lining up to make a pitch at him. Whether he opts into his lucrative contract and demands a trade or decides to enter free agency on his own, LeBron will have his pick of teams around the NBA. He can go wherever he wants.

LeBron James Was Right: He Could Have Won Seven Rings in Miami

If there is one thing we’ve learned about LeBron James over the course of his career, it’s that those who doubt him do so at their own risk. Whether screaming that LeBron was making a mistake coming to the Miami Heat or giving the Cleveland Cavaliers no chance at coming back from a 3-1 deficit in the 2016 NBA Finals…

Everyone Wants the Miami Marlins to Go Back to Being the Florida Marlins

The Florida Marlins are back this week, but only for a handful of days. If it were up to the fans, though, the Florida Marlins would be here to stay. In fact, the fans are right: Now that the hated Jeffrey Loria regime is gone, the Miami Marlins should move back to their roots and rebrand themselves the Florida Marlins — complete with a return to their distinctive teal attire.

Hassan Whiteside Is Ruining His Trade Value by Complaining About the Heat

Hassan Whiteside isn’t happy with the Miami Heat. The Miami Heat isn’t happy with Hassan Whiteside. If this were a marriage, lawyers would have already been involved. Unfortunately, especially for the Heat, parting ways with the team’s disgruntled center won’t be as easy as filing for divorce. Their relationship is a mess, with no sign of reconciliation in sight.

Marlins Are on the Verge of Setting an All-Time Record for Worst Attendance

Unsurprisingly, no one is attending Marlins games this year. Well, that’s not true. A few people are going to Marlins games this year. But by the standards of a normal Major League Baseball team, the league-worst 10,000 fans the Fish are drawing per game is bad — on the verge of historically bad. You know your attendance is a special kind of bad when the Tampa Bay Rays are outdrawing you by nearly 50 percent.

Miami Heat Must Trade Goran Dragic This Offseason

It’s been a couple of weeks since the Heat was rudely dismissed from the playoffs by the Philadelphia 76ers. Though the result of the series doesn’t tell the entire story of how close the games against the Sixers were, one thing is certain as the Heat enters the offseason: Miami isn’t close to being a serious contender, and it won’t be in the conversation for an NBA title anytime soon.

A Brief History of Miami Commissioner Joe Carollo’s Craziest Moments

Joe Carollo. Even uttering his name can raise the blood pressure among those who have followed Miami politics since the early ’90s. Miamians tend to shrug off political lunacy, so it takes a special kind of elected official to earn the moniker “Loco Joe.” Remember when a shark rode Metromover in 2009 and most locals simply shrugged and moved on?