Forget about absentee ballot brokers stealing elections! Forget about county officials stealing from the public till! Forget about the Miami Marlins ball park boondoggle! Irresponsible dog owners are clearly the greatest menace facing our community.A pair of Miami-Dade County commissioners are pushing legislation that would publicly shame assholes who don’t…
Read “Golden Beach Police: Sexual Assault, Kidnapping And Violence.”When Tammy Valdes tried to expose corruption inside the Golden Beach Police Department, town officials responded by firing the ten-year police veteran. One of the excuses the town used to kick her off the small police force on Nov. 30, 2009? That…
Gabby Douglas’s Hairy Situation
DJ Seasunz’s Drug Use Didn’t Make Him a Murderer
See also “Nicki Minaj ‘Voting For Romney'” and “Obama on Nicki Minaj’s Romney Endorsement.'” Nicki Minaj: rapper, butt-shaker, psychopath, flip-flopper? Well, the YMCMB lady boss insists her political back-and-forthing is just some kind of artistic, lyrical privilege. She’s now claiming that her statement about voting for Mitt Romney was simply…
See also “Obama Salutes Jay-Z at Made in America Fest: ‘He Worked Hard and Plain Refused to Quit.'” He may have come from the bottom of bottom to the Top of the Pops. But the hustler named Shawn Carter doesn’t back blind classicism for the sake of tax-bracket rage, son…
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke wants blacks to stop being so envious and hateful toward one another.We African-Americans are our own worst enemies…
The first dose of cultural reflection Miamians enjoyed en masse was the video Shit Miami Girls Say. It was one of the best imitations of the stereotypical Miami we know and love. Deep down inside, we could all relate to it in some way. But last week, Hialeah’s Finest Kitchen With…
See also “Kanye Raps About Kim Kardashian’s Sex Tape, Reveals ‘Dark Twisted [Cuckold] Fantasy.'” The world has been obsessed with Kimye for only about six months. Still, in that short span, this unholy union between two of America’s most dangerous attention-seeking missiles, Kanye West and Kim Kardashian, has fueled a…
A lot of rappers get into acting. Some hip-hoppers even try their hand at directing. But not a lot of MCs are making skin flicks. But turns out, Tyga hasn’t made enough money off his huge hit “Rack City.” So he’s turning it into a porn franchise. Hot off getting…
See also “Nicki Minaj ‘Voting For Romney’,” “Nicki Minaj Not Registered to Vote,” and “Nicki Minaj Admits Romney Endorsement Was Total Bullshit.” Unemployment dipped to 8.1 percent in August, according to a recent report by the Labor Department, and Florida’s jobless rate continues to flirt with 9 percent. So when…
Ever since stepping off la esquina, Mr. 305 has harbored deep hopes of becoming Mr. Hollywood. So whenever he hasn’t been too busy honing his craft in Bud Light commercials or buttering up movie biz elites with personalized remixes of the Men in Black III theme, this budding thespian has…
“What’s your favorite restaurant?” That question, recently batted around at our weekly editorial meeting, got us all thinking. If we had to choose one favorite at gunpoint, what would that restaurant be, and why? Each week, a different Short Order blogger will celebrate his or her favorite eatery — be…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Read “Hialeah Gardens Cop Lawrence Perez Shows How Drugs Can Corrupt Police.”A Hialeah Gardens Police detective who was helping his pals rip off marijuana dealers got 151 months in federal prison yesterday. Miami New Times profiled Lawrence Perez in June after a jury found him guilty of two felony counts…
Last week, I wrote a cover story on the slow death of Cuban American news talk radio in Miami. As the Hispanic population in Miami-Dade has gotten more diverse over the past decade, the frequencies for hardline right-wing programming focused on getting rid of the Castro regime has shrunk considerably.After…
Luke’s Gospel: Condoleezza Rice Is an Uncle Tom
Cuban Radio Commentators Are Just Like Castro
See also “Nicki Minaj ‘Voting For Romney’,” “Obama on Nicki Minaj’s Romney Endorsement,” and “Nicki Minaj Admits Romney Endorsement Was Total Bullshit.” Even if Mitt Romney may have Nicki Minaj’s endorsement, the Republican Party’s presidential candidate can’t count on her vote. She’s not registered. As noted by Hip Hop Wired,…
Read: “Michael Corleone Blanco lives in the shadow of his cocaine-queen mother””Jon Roberts, Smuggler in Cocaine Cowboys, Dies””Griselda Blanco, Miami’s Cocaine Queen, Assassinated In Medellin Butcher Shop””Cocaine king Max Mermelstein came out of hiding for a screenwriter”The golden years hasn’t turned out so good for most of the retired drug…
See also “Nicki Minaj Not Registered to Vote,” “Obama on Nicki Minaj’s Romney Endorsement,” and “Nicki Minaj Admits Romney Endorsement Was Total Bullshit.” Hold up … Nicki Minaj is a Republican now? Everyone’s up in arms because of a new verse that the eccentric rhymestress slurred on Lil Wayne’s new…
Blanco had made a lot of enemies during her reign as Miami’s cocaine queen.
