305 Photo of the Day: Miami Beach in the Round
Today’s photo comes from Juggie305’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group…
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Showing 20813 - 20834 of 31938Frederica Wilson Will Ask Speaker Boehner to Overturn Sexist Ban on Hats in Congress
Representative-elect Frederica Wilson has arrived in DC, and one of her first matters of business seems to be to overturn a rule dating back to the 1800s that forbids members of Congress from wearing hats while the body is in session. You see, Wilson simply loves hats. She is never…
Charlie Crist Will Pardon Jim Morrison
After the failed debacle of his Independent senate run Charlie Crist’s legacy is in grave danger, so it’s no surprise he’s decided to become the “guy who finally pardoned Jim Morrison.” After indicating he was open to pardoning The Doors frontman of indecency charges stemming from an infamous 1969 Miami…
High Speed Police Chase in Miami Ends When Driver Collides With Tanker Trunk
An unruly high speed car chase that lead police on a pursuit of one or possibly two armed robbery suspects through out the streets of Miami this morning ended when the driver violently crashed his car into the back of a tanker truck on I-95. The driver survived and was…
Four(01K) Loko: A New Times Guide to Gaming the Recession
These days, Miami is a steaming pile of ultra-high unemployment, corruption, and bullsh*t promises to “change the system” or “get rid of politics as usual.”Yet, amid this chaotic crap heap there are opportunities for turning a serious profit. But you’ve got to act quickly to corner the market and ride…
Chris Bosh Has an Unfortunate New Theme Song: “Like a Bosh”
We know everyone hates Chris Bosh. People hate him so much that he’s already inspired a brand new exciting turn of phrase in the English language: “Like a Bosh.” The Basketball Jones defines the idiom as, “When someone or something desires the limelight only to wilt under the new-found pressure.”…
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The Miami Heat Ban Esquire Writer Scott Raab for Calling LeBron “The Whore of Akron”
The Miami Heat continue to take pages right out of the Hugo Chavez playbook when it comes to working with members of the press. If you write anything the organization doesn’t particularly like you’re pretty much banned. New Times itself has suffered such a fate, and now we welcome Esquire…
Four Loko Will Live On Without Caffeine
Following reports that the FDA will effectively ban the sale of alcoholic drinks with caffeine the makers of Four Loko have announced that they are removing all caffeine, taurine, and guarana from their drinks. So people across the country will still be able to buy 23.5 ounces of highly alcoholic…
Dolphins’ Phillip Merling No Longer Faces Charges for Allegedly Hitting his Pregnant Girlfriend
If the Dolphins’ Phillip Merling did violently assault his pregnant fiancée it seems he won’t be facing any formal consequences for it. The Broward State Attorney’s office has announced that they’re dropping all charges after the victim in the case refused to continue cooperating. The Dolphins meanwhile never punished Merling. Even following his arrest…
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Thanksgiving? No Thanks for Cody, George W. and J Lo
Thanksgiving: a glutton’s favorite holiday and a vegetarian’s worst nightmare. Love it or hate it, we’re a week away from miserable flight delays, Salvation Army Santas, and arguing about politics with distant family relatives at the dinner table; we love the Holidays. And this year, we’ve got plenty to be…
Arturo Carvajal, Miami Doctor, Sues Houston’s Restaurant for Not Teaching Him How to Properly Eat Artichoke
Most people know how to eat an artichoke: Using your teeth, you scrape the meat from the bottom of each leaf. But Miamian Arturo Carvajal, a doctor with a family practice in Hollywood and a litigant in one of the stranger lawsuits we’ve ever seen, was mystified by the vegetable…
The FDA is Set to Ban Four Loko in a Defeat of Capitalism and Freedom
In a treacherous blow to the personal freedoms of Americans and Capitalism itself the FDA is expected to ban the sale of caffeinated alcohol drinks as soon as next week. Yes, alcohol and caffeine, two perfectly legal and widely available substances will not be allowed to be sold together in…
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A Short Heat History Lesson: The 2006 Championship Team Started at 6-4 Too
Do people not understand how the NBA works? What is with all these supposed fans throwing up their hands in disgust and haters flying onto proverbial supercarriers and hoisting a “Mission Accomplished” banner? Yeah, the Heat are sitting at 6-4. It’s not a great record by any means, but it’s…
305 Photo of the Day: Miami Dolphin
Today’s photo comes from The Fine Art Galaxy’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group…
MIA Ranked Second Most Hellish Airport in U.S. for Second Year Running
If Dante were to restage his Divine Comedy in the Magic City, his seven levels of hell would begin in the bleachers at a Miami Heat home game before descending into a hotel hot tub with George Rekers.But no trip to the underworld would be complete without a hellish holiday…
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Stephen Morris Will Start for Hurricanes on Saturday
Miami has become the land of great quarterback uncertainty, but unlike a certain professional team we’ll have some deserved faith in who will be starting for our college team in their next game. True freshman Stephen Morris will make his third straight start for the ‘Canes against Virginia Tech this…
Archdiocese of Miami Sued Over Alleged Sexual Abuse by Coral Springs Music Teacher
The Archdiocese of Miami is getting hit with yet another lawsuit claiming sexual abuse by an employee of the Church.A lawsuit filed this morning in Miami-Dade Circuit Court alleges that Miguel Cala, a former music teacher and youth minister at St. Andrew’s Catholic School in Coral Springs, molested at least…
Bob Dole Says Charlie Crist Would Have Voted with Republicans After All
Probably the greatest let down of not electing Charlie Crist to the Senate is not getting to watch him navigate through DC as an independent. He aggressively courted Democrats in the final weeks of the campaign, at one point seemingly open to the idea of Kendrick Meek dropping out and…
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Dolphins Media Members Cat Fight!
Apparently, the local beat writers that cover the Miami Dolphins at the Sun-Sentinel and Miami Herald have been sniping at each other the last couple of days. It’s mainly been done on twitter, because you can really zing a guy in 140 characters or less.You want to know what’s going…
Suicidal Gunman Shoots Two Women and a Toddler in North Miami
Stephanie Peterson, age 22, was babysitting a young child in the apartment of Kizzy Williams, 31, when her boyfriend showed up ready for an argument. Tavaris Fair, 25, fired several shots in the North Miami apartment before ending his own life after a long standoff with police…
Key West A Bicycle Heaven No More?
We’ve given up on Miami — home of bloodthirsty drivers and bureaucrats too inept to implement bike lanes — ever being a good place to ride a bicycle…
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Denise Crull, Drunk-Looking Florida Woman, Interviewed After Hitting A School Bus
A bit of free legal advice from the offices of Riptide and Riptide, LLC: If you’ve just finished drunkenly swerving your car into a school bus full of children and someone thrusts a TV camera in your face, plead the fifth. Or walk away. Or act like you only speak…