305 Photo of the Day: Best Public Art

Today’s photo, of a Best of Miami winner, no less, comes from Ohhector’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group.Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…

Classless DeShawn Stevenson Arrested For Being Drunk and Lost

Dallas Maverick and all-around shitty person DeShawn Stevenson done got himself arrested. What a pity.Stevenson, who called the Miami Heat “classless” after game 6 and then showed up in Dallas the next day wearing a T-shirt that said “Hey LeBron! How’s my Dirk taste,” was arrested last night after he…

South Florida Has A Winning Team: Men’s Beach Soccer

We get it already — the Heat lost. It was sad. But another team has been defending Miami’s honor, and these guys actually won a championship — Florida Beach Soccer FC, a five-man team of footballers with professional credentials who are now the North American Sand Soccer champions.It’s more serious…

Shaq’s Bizarre Sex Tape and Kidnapping Scandal

LeBron James might be the most hated man in basketball, but at least he’s not involved in a bizarre scandal involving gang members, robbery, kidnapping, and a sex tape. Can’t say the same for Shaquille O’Neal. Los Angeles prosecutors are investigating a weird case allegedly centered on a tape showing the…

Send Your Kids to Florida’s Tea Party Summer Camp

Are you a faithful member of the Tea Party? Are you worried that your kids, little Ronnie and Reagan, aren’t fully committed to your political cause? Well, why not have them stay with a relative in Tampa for a week to attend a Tea Party summer camp where they can…

Many Think Miami Is Nice Place for Free Wedding (updated)

About 9,000 people from across the country entered the “Marry Me in Miami” contest for a wedding at the Biltmore Hotel in Coral Gables worth $150,000, according to organizers at the Greater Miami Convention & Visitors Bureau.Five couples were randomly chosen from as far away as Chicago to compete June…

Best of Miami 2011 Rises From the Dead

BRAAAAAAIIIIIIINSSS! Er, excuse us. We meant to say the wait is finally over. Best of Miami 2011 is finally here. Winners were chosen by the New Times editorial board in 345 categories such as Best New Restaurant, Best Dance Club, Best Art Museum, Best Tattoo Shop, and others.If you are waiting…

Miami Importer of Chinese Drywall Hit With $55 Million Ruling

Banner Supply Company was ordered Tuesday to pay hundreds of Florida homeowners $55 million dollars for selling them Chinese drywall that emitted sulfurous gases, according to Reuters. The gas smells horrible and is believed to have damaged wiring and appliances and caused illnesses in the homes where it was installed.The…

Suggested Curriculum for Miami’s 2012 Porn Summit

​Pornographers of Miami: Order more business cards.The XBIZ Summit — partially sponsored this year by the “PussyCash Affiliate Network” — is an annual three-day networking event for “online adult business professionals,” and it’s headed for the city next summer, according to adult industry news site XBIZ.com…

Lie: Rick Scott Infers He’s Better at Creating Job Than Obama

It’s one thing for a politician to twist facts and figures to support his own agenda. Unfortunately, it’s just business as usual for the political class. It’s quite another for a politician to have such little faith in the intelligence of his constituents that he straight-up lies about figures anyone…

Elderly Man Drowns in Biscayne Bay

A body found in Biscayne Bay this morning is believed to be that of an elderly man who accidentally drowned. A passerby had spotted the body floating in the bay around Southeast 15th Road and Brickell Bay Drive…

Report: Erik Spoelstra’s Job is Safe

Oh, no, Spo’ won’t go. According to reports from The Boston Globe (of all papers), Miami Heat coach Erik Spoelstra’s job is safe for next year. Its sources also claim that at no point in the season was Spoelstra’s job ever in danger…