You know that show Storage Wars where people bid on the contents of unpaid storage units? Well, imagine a situation like that, except the winning bidder finds out he’s bought a storage unit that contains the remains — including hearts, lungs, and 10 brains — that had belonged to over…
Read our original story about another finger-severing Smarte Carte accident at MIA.Marina Sammartino is a sweet 77-year-old Argentine abuelita. But ask her about Miami International Airport and she lifts her left hand to show a stump where her pinky should be. “What’s going on there is a scandal,” she says…
Check out our previous coverage of Tropical Storm IsaacAs you probably noticed by looking outside Monday morning and seeing that everything was intact, save some larger-than-usual puddles and broken branches, Tropical Storm Isaac wasn’t exactly an apocalyptic event for Miami. Sure, it did result in some canceled flights, power outages,…
Well, it wouldn’t be a crazy Republican sideshow without Miami’s own SNL-star-turned-Tea-Party-queen Victoria Jackson. Everyone’s favorite squeaky voiced conspiracy theorist is up in Tampa for the Republican National Convention with her video camera in hand. She’s already run into a super hero who fights political apathy. Even though Mr. Super…
What stands between Mitt Romney and victory in Florida? Apparently women and minority voters. Barack Obama has hefty advantages in those two demographics according to the latest Time/CNN poll, which shouldn’t be too surprising considering his party has found itself embroiled in controversies in the past few years regarding women’s…
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While there are plenty of talking heads doubtful that Al Golden’s young Miami Hurricanes will even be able to win six games this season, old Howard Schnellenberger put down his pipe for a second, traveled down to Coral Gables, took one look at the team, and decided they were just…
You can call 911 to come put out a fire, but that fire better not be in your pants. Yes, a Florida man sits behind bars after he tried to use 911 as his own personal sex service. He called the emergency service to request that female deputies report to…
Perhaps no industry geared up for the Republican National Convention like Tampa’s strip club scene. Clubs redecorated, added extra privacy, revamped their food menus, and even brought in famous talent. Yet, on Sunday night at least, the clubs seemed pretty barren ahead of the start of the convention…
The Miami Dolphins have traded former first-round pick Vontae Davis to the Indianapolis Colts for a 2013 second-rounder as well as a conditional late-round pick. Obviously, this is a move that makes sense on several fronts given the Midas-like wealth of talent the Dolphins possess at virtually every position on…
The worst of Tropical Storm Isaac has officially blown through the Keys and into the Gulf this morning, though its sloppy remains are still drenching Dade. Riptide’s storm experts have begun tallying the damage Isaac wrought in Florida: 80,000 or so without power, minor flooding here and there, and dozens…
Your average Carnival cruise offers plenty of entertainment options. You can stuff yourself full of deli meats and warmed-over pasta at the buffet. You can swim in a chlorinated pool in the middle of an ocean. You can pretend to like shuffleboard. Or, like Orlando resident Kurt Gies, you can…
If you’re like us at Riptide, your eyes have been rolling all morning watching NBC 6, CBS 4, Local 10, and WSVN make fools of themselves reporting on the “awful” conditions brought by Tropical Storm Isaac. Yeah, there’s been some rain and wind, and Miami even experienced some brownouts last night,…
It’s happening, people! Southern Miami-Dade and the Florida Keys are under a hurricane watch as Tropical Storm Isaac keeps moving northwest at 17 mph. The northern part of the county remains under a hurricane warning.The latest NOAA update has the storm making landfall in Cuba with max sustained winds at…
Marco Rubio loves Nicki Minaj. We’re just going to guess that World’s Greatest Elevator Music Vol. 1 is Bill Nelson’s favorite album of all time. But what does Republican Senate candidate Connie Mack IV listen to? Confederate flag-embracing rockers Lynyrd Skynyrd, of course…
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Rush Limbaugh sure knows a lot about hot air, so, you know, he’s pretty much an expert on hurricanes. He seems to think that President Barack Obama is personally responsible for guiding Tropical Storm Isaac to Tampa, or something. Nothing he says really makes much sense…
Jennifer Lopez sold her Miami Beach mansion for $13.9 million back in 2005. The new owners originally put the La Gorce Island home on the market for $29 million in 2010. It didn’t sell, so now they’ve changed the price. A discount? No. It’s now listed for $40 million. All…
A Florida teenager is recovering after accidentally shooting himself in the dick. Obviously, all of Florida is hoping and praying that this genius will recover and one day be able to procreate.The incident happened early Thursday morning in Port St. Lucie. Police arrived at the local hospital to check out…
Is tropical storm Isaac God’s way of smiting Tod Akin for saying stupid sh*t? Is it a coincidence that the squall is set to touch down at the very moment that Rick Scott takes to the podium in Tampa? Does Jesus just hate the GOP?Get a hold of yourself, man!…
Riptide’s Crack Weather Team has just issued this update on Tropical Storm Isaac: 9:45 AM EST/ Wind shear and disorganized flow have hampered Isaac’s development, but a dip in low pressure means by that this afternoon Isaac will begin inexorably raging with the blind, horrible fury of a pack of…
See also, “Photos: Remembering Hurricane Andrew” and “Hurricane Andrew at 20: Miami Herald Reporters Remember.”Twenty years ago today, Hurricane Andrew made landfall at Elliott Key as a Category Five monster before tearing west through Miami-Dade and leaving $26.5 billion in damage in its wake. In 1992, Miamians didn’t have cell…
