A 34-year-old Florida Keys man is recovering at Ryder Trauma Center after being attacked by a teenager with a golf club during a spat about Facebook. According to the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office, the incident occurred at about 1:30 a.m. on Fat Deer Key. Deputies responded to a call that…
A distinguished, handsome Italian gentleman saunters into a Miami Beach tattoo shop that’s drenched in purple neon light. He’s out of place in multiple ways. First off, it’s a hot July evening, and he’s bundled up in a long beige scarf. Second, he’s dressed straight out of GQ with his…
On the final drive of Sunday’s victory over the Andrew Luck-led Colts, there was that creeping feeling the NFL’s newest comeback kid would do the thing Dolphins fans are so used to seeing: snatch victory from the jaws of defeat by putting a big ol’ dunce hat on the Dolphins…
Like her native state, Miss Florida Myrrhanda Jones might not have been the best all-around candidate at the Miss America pageant this weekend, but she sure as hell provided the best entertainment. Jones, a senior at the University of Florida, somehow tore her ACL while practicing her baton-twirling performance. But…
Is there anything more embarrassing for a baseball player to wear than a Marlins jersey? A pink spandex tank top and bootie shorts might come close. Every year the Marlins make their rookie players dress up in some ridiculous outfit. So yesterday first year players, including Jose Fernandez, were made…
We already know that LeBron James will be the cover athlete and has had some creative input for the upcoming NBA 2K14 video game, but Yahoo! Sports reports today that the game will have a surprise feature. Players will be able to play a storyline that imagines how LeBron’s career…
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Turns out one of the biggest threats to cruise ship passengers at the Port of Miami were security guards hired to protect them. Jean Russell Thomas, 30, and Sherece Nelson, 25, were arrested after police uncovered their practice of stealing iPads and other electronics from passengers and then selling the…
Atlanta is getting a Major League Soccer team. Several reports today suggest that the deal is all but done. Which, in a way, is good news for Miami soccer fans, as it suggests the MLS is serious about bringing the league back to the South with Atlanta, Orlando, and Miami…
A high school in Jacksonville with a majority African-American student population is named for the first grand wizard of the Ku Klux Klan, which is just wrong on so many levels. Now the school’s name is getting some national attention after a Change.org petition to have the name changed has…
Unbelievably, the Dolphins won their season opener for the first time since 2007 last Sunday. EHRRR MERR GERRRSH! The defense was stout, Ryan Tannehill seemed to elevate his game (especially on 3thirdrd downs), Mike Wallace was already being considered as trade bait for his belly-aching postgame and Michael Egnew cried…
It’s easy to get sad while perusing CraigsList. A quick stroll through Casual Encounters proves how depraved humankind can be. Almost every page is plastered with reminders to be wary of scams. But one entry that appeared earlier this month intrigued us with its title: “Do you believe in Happiness????????????”…
Just because Miami Police officers have a bit of a problem with shooting unarmed black men, doesn’t mean they don’t deserve a lil’ sumpin’ sumpin’ extra. At least, that’s what city commissioners seemed to suggest last night when they gave preliminary approval to a $524 million budget that would give…
This is a true story. Back when I was studying at the University of Miami and enrolled in a class taught by President Donna Shalala, she excused herself to take a call on her gold Motorola Razr, and in that instant, she gained the admiration of every sorority girl on…
Today’s photo comes from Blue Skyz Media’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group. Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…
Sure, Florida is one of the most populous states in the country, but it represents only 6 percent of America’s population. Though, it’s probably not a surprise that Floridians have represented 13.7 percent of college football recruits since 2008. That’s surpassed (and just barely) only by Texas…
Carlos Bertonatti today was handed a 12-year sentence for the DUI manslaughter of Christophe Le Canne in 2010, finally bringing justice for the cyclist more than three and a half years later. On an early morning in January 2010, Bertonatti, an aspiring pop star, was driving his Volkswagen back to…
If the results are any indication, Hilda Caballero Diaz-Balart was a supermom. Her sons Lincoln and Mario grew up to become congressmen. Her son Rafael is a banker, and her other son Jose is the main national news anchor for Telemundo. The Cuban matriarch passed away yesterday afternoon at the…
A man who used a pair of scissors to fatally stab a popular Florida International University football player was found guilty of second-degree murder yesterday. Six jurors convicted Quentin Wyche. According to CBS4, Wyche’s mother sang a hymn as he was handcuffed and led out of the courtroom. Wyche had…
Last year, Florida pastor Terry Jones had the divinely inspired idea of turning September 11 into “International Judge Muhammad Day.” The act of bigoted brilliance sparked protests in many Muslim countries. Some experts even credited Jones’ stunt with inspiring the deadly terrorist attack on the U.S. consulate in Benghazi. Like…
It’s 3 a.m. and pitch-black except for a spot of light pollution emanating from the island of North Bimini — and a 669-foot-long ship bumping with club music. Suddenly, DJ Zog, of Power 96 fame, cuts the sound. He announces that Kok Thay Lim has arrived to cut his birthday…
I must start out by admitting that I am on a quest for vengeance.” That is not the opening line of The Count of Monte Cristo but the beginning of a recent letter to New Times. With that introduction, we expected a typically Miami tale of murder and malevolence. Instead,…
