Trump Might Appoint Apprentice Loser as Miami Prosecutor, So We Watched the Episode Where He Gets Fired

Jose Felix “Pepi” Diaz (not to be confused with Miami-Dade County Commissioner Jose “Pepe” Diaz) was fired after two episodes on the reality show The Apprentice in 2006. He’d been tasked with coming up with a business proposal for Gillette, which was trying to sell some sort of five-razor-blade monstrosity to insecure men. Diaz ended up sleeping in on the day of his pitch and was fired for lack of leadership.

Re-Read New Times’ Classic ’90s Coverage of the Cocaine Cowboy Caught This Week After 26 Years

Willy Falcon and Sal Magluta ran the largest smuggling ring of the Miami’s cocaine-fueled heyday. The two high-school friends built a $2 billion trafficking empire, which snaked through multiple banks, states, properties, and even one speedboat-racing league. Though “Willy and Sal,” as they were known, were eventually caught and convicted after nearly a decade of court proceedings in the 1990s, Willy’s brother, Gustavo “Taby” Falcon, vanished 26 years ago before the feds could lock him up.

Developer Wants to Pave Over Protected Wetlands Next to Proposed Megamall

If it comes to fruition, American Dream Miami would be one of the largest malls in the nation. The $3 billion project is the definition of South Florida largesse: In addition to offering the standard list of luxury shops, American Dream would include an ice rink, a lake for submarine rides, a water park, a theme park, and an indoor ski slope.

Florida ACLU Sues Homeland Security for Muslim-Ban Records From MIA

For all the debate, tears, and fury that President Trump’s short-lived “Muslim ban” caused, the public actually knows surprisingly little about what happened at airports. The exact techniques Customs and Border Protection agents used before courts quashed the ban have remained secret. And since the ban was suspended in February, Muslims across the nation, including Miami’s Muhammad Ali Jr., have been detained illegally anyway.

Court Upholds $300,000 Fine After Trump Refuses to Pay Miami Paint Store

Donald Trump is so rich. Big-league (bigly?) wealthy. So wonderfully wealthy that he apparently owes a Miami paint store $300,000 for work at his Trump National Doral Miami resort. So wealthy he’s been fighting not to pay that $300,000 since last year. So wealthy that his lawyers officially lost an appeal yesterday and now he’s gotta pay that $300,000 or try to appeal all the way to the Florida Supreme Court.

Charges in Kinsey Case Raise Questions About Past Police Killings Rundle Neglected

Miami-Dade State Attorney Katherine Fernandez Rundle, the county’s top prosecutor, made history yesterday. For the first time in her 24 years on the job, she charged a Miami-area cop for an on-duty shooting when she filed attempted manslaughter charges against North Miami Officer Jonathan Aledda, who shot Charles Kinsey, an unarmed black man, in the leg last year.

Ben Carson Got Trapped in a Miami Elevator Today, Proving God Is Real and Hilarious

Nothing can happen in Miami this year that will be funnier than Ben Carson getting stuck inside an elevator today. Nothing. There is no single image more hilarious than the look on Carson’s face as he walked through the elevator’s metal doors at Overtown’s Courtside Family Apartments and then realized they weren’t going to open. Carson and Miami-Dade County Public Housing Director Michael Liu were trapped inside the elevator for a solid 20 minutes this morning while firefighters searched for a way to free the two.

Don Cattingly, Miami’s Greatest Cat, Delays Marlins Game and Then Vanishes Into Little Havana

These are dark times for Miami Marlins fans. There’s a raw, Jose Fernandez-sized hole in this franchise, and the one comfort that Fish fans could lean on this year — hated owner Jeffrey Loria’s impending sale of the team — still looks a long way from happening. You’d forgive Fish faithful from feeling blue as they shuffled into Marlins Park for the home opener last night.

Five Greatest Playoff Moments in Miami Heat History

Tonight is the last night of the 2016-17 regular season for the Miami Heat. Fans have grown accustomed to this time of year as just the beginning, not the end, of all the fun. But we won’t know until after tonight if the Heat will get to continue playing: Miami needs to beat the Washington Wizards, and the Bulls or Pacers must end up with a loss.

Miami Beach Police Sued for Allegedly Humiliating Nude Woman Over $16 Cab Fare

Rarely is it worth calling the cops over anything less than $20. Too much can go wrong to bring police into a fight over something worth the cost of a fancy sandwich. Candace Padavick, a Miami Beach resident, says she lived that very nightmare in 2013: After she couldn’t pay a $16 cab fare in cash, Padavick’s cabbie called the cops. Padavick, in the meantime, went inside to take a shower, and her doorman paid the cabbie.

Mana Wynwood Could Become Huge Latin American-Asian Financial Center

Miami residents were already skeptical about mega-developer Moishe Mana’s plans to pave over a huge portion of Wynwood and build a gleaming micro-city in its place. Mana, who splits his time between Manhattan and the Magic City, is the largest single landowner in Wynwood. For years, he’s been fighting to…

North Miami Cop Arrested After Allegedly Slamming Wife’s Head on Ground

The North Miami Police Department appears to be in disarray: In the past two years, the department failed a critical accreditation test and shot Charles Kinsey, an unarmed black man. After audio emerged last week of the department’s chief describing widespread dysfunction among his cops, North Miami officials have been desperately trying reassure the public that the force is fixing its problems.

Florida Sheriff Films ISIS-Style Video Starring Deputies in Ski Masks

Across the nation, politicos and police alike have pushed a “compassionate” response to the heroin epidemic. Everyone from Chris Christie to Eric Holder have called the problem a public health crisis and argued the best response is a combination of reduced legal opioid prescriptions (in part through legal medical weed) and better treatment options for addicts.

This Has Been Pat Riley’s Greatest Season With the Miami Heat

The 2016-17 season is one of Pat Riley’s greatest achievements with the Miami Heat. Yes, this season, when there’s still a good chance the Heat won’t come close to raising another banner or planning another parade on Biscayne Boulevard. This Heat team’s never-say-die comeback has shown the entire league why Riley is a legendary NBA executive.