Sea-Level-Rise Warrior Philip Levine Can’t Answer Basic Paris Agreement Question

Tucker Carlson is such an insufferable little snot that he was forced to stop wearing bow ties because they made him look like the estranged son Orville Redenbacher wrote out of his will. The premise of Carlson’s poisonous cable-news TV show is to catch liberal politicians and pundits in manufactured “Gotcha!” moments that then feed the conservative clickbait blogosphere for another seven days. If you appear on his show and let him nail you, it is entirely your fault. His show is useless, and you are a mark.

Miami Beach Commissioner Threatens to Force Purdy Lounge to Close at 2 a.m.

For 17 years, Purdy Lounge has been the low-key antidote to South Beach’s overhyped, overpriced, and overcrowded club scene. The Sunset Harbour mainstay has never charged a cover to enter its dimly lit interior, where separate rooms pump out old-school hip-hop and current dance hits, all with reasonably priced cocktails flowing.

History Shows the Heat Won’t Get Anything With the 14th Pick

At one point last season, the Miami Heat held the projected second-overall pick in this year’s NBA draft. That’s what an 11-30 record gets you: lots of Ping-Pong balls and, if you’re lucky, a franchise-player building block to un-suck yourself right quick. What a miraculous 30-11 second half of the season gets you is a lot of good feelings, pats on the asses, and the 14th overall selection in the draft.

Florida ACLU Condemns MDPD’s Request for Widespread Surveillance Airplanes

The Miami-Dade Police Department has already applied for a $500,000 Department of Justice grant to fly planes over the county that can record and track the movements of the city’s population. These “wide-area surveillance” systems were originally developed to track insurgents planting car bombs during the Iraq War — but now the technology is being used on American civilians.

Miami Beach Cop Fired for Racist Emails Sues to Get His Job Back

After he was fired for sending dozens of racist, homophobic, misogynistic, and pornographic messages from his city email account, Miami Beach Police Lt. Alex Carulo apologized to internal investigators. “It was foolish, poor judgment on my part, and I accept full responsibility,” he said. “It is what it is.”

Miami Beach Police Major Disciplines Employee for Promoting “Integrity”

The Miami Beach Police Department’s basic mission statement tells officers to conduct themselves with “honor, courage, integrity.” The slogan is routinely plastered on official city and department documents. But when Lori Freedline, a civilian employee at MBPD, hung signs in her office that encouraged employees to act with “integrity” and to beware of “karma,” her boss wasn’t happy.

Marlins Set a New Record for Most Pathetic Home Crowd of Less Than 2,000

Hey, Miami, your hometown Marlins have actually been playing some pretty good baseball. They’ve won four in a row and are no longer living in the moldy basement of the NL East. Their pitching staff has stopped handing out walks like sketchy club flyers in South Beach, and Stanton and Ozuna have started mashin’ taters again.

MDPD Wants to Record Entire County From the Sky Using Iraq War Technology

After the Freddie Gray riots in 2015, Baltimore residents began noticing small planes circling the city. As reporters later uncovered, Baltimore Police had quietly employed a “wide-area surveillance” system, which uses Cessna planes to constantly record the movements of an entire city. Police never bothered to tell the public they was using the invasive technology…

Angry Public Scolds Rundle at Miami-Dade Democratic Party Meeting About Rainey Case

When State Attorney Katherine Fernandez Rundle’s office decided this past March not to charge four prison guards who oversaw the death of Darren Rainey — a black, schizophrenic prisoner scalded to death inside a locked shower — she announced the move in a late-Friday news dump without a press conference. But the decision caused national outrage, with critics noting that in her 24 years in office, Rundle has never charged a guard or cop for an on-duty death.

Half of Miami’s Construction Workers Struggle to Afford Rent, Food, or Medical Care

Given the building industry’s outsize role in the local ecosystem, you might assume Miami’s construction workers are able to earn a solid living from the profession. But a study released earlier this month shows 44 percent of Miami’s construction workers have trouble paying for basic necessities such as rent, food, hospital bills, utility payments, and items for their children.

Roger Stone Arrested: A Brief History of his Weirdest South Florida Antics UPDATED

Roger Stone has been at the heart of three of the objectively worst things to happen in the Sunshine State in the 21st Century: When a group of angry white folks protested in 2000 to stop the Bush v. Gore recount, Stone later admitted he staged the whole thing to get Bush elected. When Scott Rothstein’s record-setting Ponzi scheme fell to pieces, it turned out Stone had an office at Rothstein’s law firm.

Roger Stone Keeps Pushing Seth Rich Conspiracy Theories Despite Family Pleas

Three days ago, Fox News retracted an explosive story: The FBI was probing whether murdered Democratic National Committee staffer Seth Rich had sent thousands of emails to WikiLeaks before his mysterious death. Everyone, from the U.S. intelligence community to cybersecurity pros, says the claim is nonsense: The nearly universal consensus…