It is the loudest dining room I have ever witnessed. Not only is every one of the hundreds of patrons talking at full pitch, and incessantly, but also the ricocheting acoustics in the large, lofty space make it seem as if they are screeching at the top of their lungs…
Finding Zuperpollo Biztro the first time didn’t take quite as long as it took the starship Voyager, marooned in the Delta Quadrant, to locate Earth again. But it was close. Or at least it seemed that way. Nestled inside an office building — all the way through the long lobby,…
The Department of Business and Professional Regulation (DBPR) in Tallahasee has doubled the fine for any proven offense of food misrepresention in dining establishments (from $250 to $500, which still doesn’t seem like much punishment for deceiving the public — and increasing profits considerably while doing so). “Floridians ought to…
On May 7, I posted a blog entitled Ask the Food Critic, in which readers were encouraged to forward questions to me concerning the local food and dining scene. Sample queries were offered, such as: Is it true that Daniel Boulud will be opening a namesake establishment in downtown Miami?…
I was to meet Marco Pierre White poolside at The Raleigh Hotel at ten in the morning. Figured a cup of coffee, quick chat for a short blog, thank you very much. He had arrived in town the previous evening for a speaking gig with Gael Greene at Books &…
Sasha Issenberg, in his new book The Sushi Economy, implies that to eat raw fish on rice is to become an assiduous participant in 21st-century global capitalism. By way of illustrating sushi’s cultural adaptability, the author cites the California roll of avocado and crab — invented in Los Angeles during…
Cheap restaurant in South Beach” is dangerously close to being an oxymoron. “Good cheap restaurant in South Beach” is so oxy you almost have to be a moron to believe that such a greed-defying miracle actually exists. Well, I don’t mean to sound stupid or anything, but there’s at least…
Green Eggs And Ham, I Am (no more) A few months after filing for Chapter 11, a posted sign on the window makes it official: “Cafeteria out of business.” This round-the-clock Lincoln Road eatery premiered in November of 2003, its sister branch having opened in New York five years earlier…
Say you and your mate decide to have a romantic dinner in Coral Gables. The Hotel St. Michel comes to mind, because the room is so quiet and quaint, but as your last visit was quite some time ago, you check their website to investigate. The home page trumpets a…
If you want to feel like a tourist in your own town, go to Balans. It’s on Lincoln Road, for god’s sake. When was the last time you hung out there, oozing along with the flow of bug-eyed Midwesterners in their neatly pressed shorts and Tommy Bahamas, elegantly dressed Latins,…
When it comes to culinary firsts, Miami seldom beats Manhattan. So when an article in New York magazine virtually swooned itself silly last December about the opening of Pardo’s (a twenty-year-old Peruvian rotisserie chicken chain) in NYC, it was hard to believe. There’s been a Pardo’s Chicken in Miami for…
When One Ninety Restaurant premiered on 46th Street in Buena Vista East some four years ago, it was the first hip, bohemian-style restaurant in the area. Locals flocked to the place for the carefree environment, live music, and tasty, affordable fare. Enter greedy landlords. Exit One Ninety. Last month, after…
Sasha Issenberg is a younger guy than I had envisioned while reading his book, The Sushi Economy. I could see the youth in his face as he approached the podium at Books & Books in Coral Gables on Saturday afternoon. Then he started his talk by stating that he’s been…
Three major restaurant openings are pegged for the coming month. I am all too aware that reality rarely matches hype in the restaurant biz, but this trio truly appears to hold some promise. * On May 30th, the smartly re-designed Tides South Beach hotel will premiere its new dining establishment,…
Ouzo’s Greek Taverna & Bar has announced plans to open their second venue, to be located in the former Madiba space on South Beach’s west side — just down the block from another Mediterranean favorite, Sardinia. I’ve always enjoyed the North Miami Beach Ouzo’s, and explained why in my review…
There are seven days of the week, wonders of the world, colors in a rainbow, points on a sheriff’s star, digits in a phone number, dots on a common ladybug’s back. The Egyptians had seven gods, the Phoenicians seven kabiris, the Persians seven sacred horses, the Parsees seven angels opposed…
Damn pizza thieves! In case you were wondering, the Midtown Miami welcome wagon is in business. And Pizzafiore, server of amazing Italian food and just one of many new fast-food joints that has popped up near the New Times offices, has received the first dose of reality that often comes…
Did you know that ninety percent of all allergic reactions in the U.S. are caused by just eight foods (milk, eggs, wheat, soy, fish, shellfish, peanuts, and tree nuts such as walnuts, almonds, cashews, pistachios, pecans, etc.)? Neither did I. Nor did I realize that twelve million Americans, or one…
LA Weekly If you see this guy, feed him well Restaurant critic Jonathan Gold (LA Weekly, a sister publication of Miami New Times) recently became the first restaurant critic to ever get honored with a Pulitzer Prize. His newspaper, in honor of the well-deserved feat (Gold is one of the…
Critical Miami Hello! Still here! With deadline for Flapjack Flip-Off VII:Bananarama (coming soon!) rapidly approaching, I found myself frantically researching the subject matter at hand: Banana pancakes. As in, who the hell in Miami serves them? As it turns out, just about nobody, which is disturbing enough. But then I…
On its business card, this strip mall joint is actually called Michele European Bakery, Gelateria & Caffe, one of those names so long and unwieldly, you’d assume it says it all. It does not. In back of the cafe (named for owner Michele Pompei, who trained and worked as a…
Printed atop the old-timey logo of the new-timey Michael’s Genuine Food & Drink are the words “fresh simple pure.” Not very original. In fact so many chefs have been professing this same pledge, that “fresh simple pure” is to contemporary American cuisine what “snap crackle pop” is to Rice Krispies…
