New Times‘s Top DVD Picks for the Week of October 10, 2006

The Andy Milonakis Show: The Complete Second Season (Paramount) The A-Team: Season Five, the Final Season (Universal) Bloodied but Unbowed: Bloodshot Records’ Life in the Trenches (Bloodshot) Carlos Mencia: No Strings Attached (Paramount) Click (Sony) Don’t Go in the Woods Alone: 25th Anniversary Edition (Code Red) Everybody Hates Chris: The…

They’ll Dance to Anything

The block party holds a special place in hip-hop nostalgia. An organic coming-together of rappers and fans, b-boys and girls — all gathered in an urban setting to dance under the streetlights — has magnificent appeal. This month’s MoCASonic event taps into the memory of blockos past. Art lovers and…

Hide and Peek

There’s something delightfully vintage and naughty about a masquerade dance. An Eyes Wide Shut aura allows for incredible eye-flirting. Show them what you’ve got at tonight’s Masquerade Dance, a fabulous fundraiser hosted by Miami Arts, Design and Entertainment Merchants (MADE). Pick up a free blank mask at MADE member locations,…

Off to See

Despite its title, “The Land That Time Forgot,” Juana Valdes’s solo show, opening tonight at 6:00 at Diaspora Vibe Gallery, is not a sendup of the cheesy sci-fi movie you might expect. You won’t find images of a German U-boat blasting roaming dinosaurs on a tropical island or scantily clad…

We Heart Men in Tights

The pointy shoes, the green tights, and those rosy cheeks. Who doesn’t love a little elfin magic? For ladies who prefer a man of diminutive stature, this is your day to find your very own Seth Green at the Tropical Fairy Festival. With wands and dust aflutter, you can gleefully…

When You Gotta Go

It happens. Babies do it. Bunnies do it. Birds do it (on your car). And although we don’t really like to talk about it, boyfriends do it too (let’s hope not on your car). Heck, there is even a book that lets toddlers know we all do it: Everyone Poops…

Dancing with Windmills

For the past 401 years, people have fawned over Miguel de Cervantes’s novel Don Quixote, but for the past hundred or so they’ve also enjoyed watching the tale of the senile Spaniard unfold in dance. This weekend the Miami City Ballet opens its 2006-2007 season with a full-length production based…

That’s the Ticket

Stand in line for cigarettes at local markets and convenience stores and you’ll see that Miamians are addicted to Lotto. Local film director Will Vazquez takes the fantasy of winning a multimillion-dollar jackpot up a notch with his film Quick Pick. It is the story of Eddie, a usually unlucky…

Triskaidekaphobia Be Damned!

It is not often that the most superstitious day of the year happens during the spookiest month of the year. Jason Voorhees? Michael Meyers? They’re just a couple of normal guys tonight. Forget the slasher flicks and get your pre-Halloween partying on at Broadway Billiards (17813 Biscayne Blvd., Aventura) tonight…

Get Buzzed for Less

Though a cup of coffee may cost about $1.25, by adding steamed milk to that and calling it a latte, you’re looking at $3.50 – at least. But if you’re the type who pimps your caffeine with caramel, pumpkin spice, and extra whipped cream, you probably don’t remember the good…

Light the Trip Fantastic

Intoxicated by the buzz of an electric beer sign outside a grocery store in his San Francisco neighborhood, Bruce Nauman was inspired to create his first neon piece, Window or Wall Sign, in 1967. In it he spelled out the slogan “The True Artist Helps the World by Revealing Mystic…

Cancer Sucks

Yep, cancer is the worst and it can strike anyone. Male or female, rich or poor, the evil cells don’t care how cool you are. And they certainly don’t give a damn if you are a fabulous New York cartoonist who is finally getting married at age 43. Marisa Acocella…

That’s Haute

There’s a lot to be said for being trendy, but it is better to be timeless. Fashion authority C. Madeleine has built an international reputation on sorting haute-couture trash from treasure. Her 10,000-square-foot store in North Miami Beach houses a century’s worth of evolving style. The wealth of C. Madeleine’s…

Her Life Is a Cabaret

Mexican cabaret artist Astrid Hadad is famous for visually provocative, politically savvy, compelling performances that involve elaborate costumes and weird prop combinations — like a tutu paired with inflated condoms on sticks. Her surrealistic show takes Mexican stereotypes, turns them inside out, and remixes them into a bold, strong, and…

Andalusian Fusion

In a city like Miami, it is entirely possible to forget that some of our most popular dishes are imported. Spanish tapas have become so popular here that just about every sit-down restaurant offers some variation of the small-plate delicacies. Now the Ritz-Carlton South Beach has joined the fun by…

Be a Pepper Too

Is there enough room in this town for two spicy passion fruit cocktails? When we wandered into the Setai to sample the chic hotel’s signature drink, Billy the bartender immediately said, “Chili Passion.” Huh, that’s funny. We just had one of those last week at the Sagamore. “Well, they stole…

Banned in Iran

What to do with art that’s banned in a totalitarian state? Send it to Miami, of course! Our city is filled with exiles who have been booted form their homelands, so it’s in good company here. Consider the work of Iranian writer/artist Assurbanipal Babilla, for instance: It seems ol’ Babs…

We’re Driving Now

It’s like walking around a parking lot — after traveling into the future by time machine and landing in an extremely wealthy neighborhood. The 36th South Florida International Auto Show fills the Miami Beach Convention Center with cars you’re much more likely to encounter in dreams than on, say, the…

They Won’t Check Out

Science has identified about one million species of insects so far, accounting for almost half of all life forms known to man. Bugs can be found buzzing almost anywhere on Earth. For example, rock crawlers survive in the peaks of the Himalayas, producing a kind of antifreeze that prevents them…

The DFA Disco Dance Party with The Juan McLean

This is a cautionary critic’s call. You should know that the DJ duo of DFA will perform on Saturday at the District, 35 NE 40th St., Miami; and on Sunday at the Standard Hotel, 40 Island Ave., Miami Beach. Tim Goldsworthy and James Murphy may give the appearance of latter-day…

C-O-Ps Crash the P-A-C Party

The main event at the Carnival Center for the Performing Arts’ grand opening Thursday night? Cops. Off-duty Miami city cops picketing the high society affair (cocktail dresses and Prada suits paid $500 for a seat at the celebrity-studded event), to be more exact. They were working the media-heavy event for…

Bait and Switch

No studio director was a greater hero to the Hong Kong new wave than Martin Scorsese. John Woo dedicated The Killer to him; Wong Kar-wai modeled his first feature, As Tears Go By, after Mean Streets; Taxi Driver’s rain-slicked slo-mo urban stylistics worked their way into countless lesser HK films…