Art Community to Media: What Have You Done For Us Lately?

Miami’s art community is pissed off at New Times, along with every media outlet in the tri-county area. And like angry villagers they gathered this past Wednesday in the bowels of Wynwood to voice their frustrations. The issue: What’s happened to Miami’s arts coverage. The panel: Alesh Houdek (Critical Miami),…

Comeback Auteur

Who knows how many bottles of Francis Ford Coppola’s Directors’ Cut Pinot Noir it would take to forget that the virtuoso who made the Godfather saga was also responsible for the sentimental embarrassment known as Jack, starring Robin Williams at his self-indulgent, man-childish worst? Thankfully, though, Coppola’s days of driving…

209 Weeks Later

Four years after “Mission Accomplished,” 28 Weeks Later reminds us that the mission, whatever the hell it was to begin with, is now officially, apocalyptically fucked. The story thus far: Seven months have gone by since the Rage virus passed from chimp fang to British bloodstream in an animal rights…

Home of the Brave

War is hell, says Home of the Brave, and if you’re Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson, so is acting. Fiddy gets a leg up from being typecast as Jamal Atkins, one of four demoralized veterans of Operation Enduring Fuckup, home from Iraq to a world of pain. How to handle back…

Badass Bard

Romeo & Juliet has been done and redone in approximately five gazillion different ways. Gounod made it into an opera; Tchaikovsky made it into a noise; Franco Zeffirelli did it as kiddie porn; Baz Luhrman did it with guns. Shakespeare’s star-crossed lovers have been used to comment on apartheid, the…

Golda’s Balcony

Golda’s Balcony: In terms of steely resolve, Golda Meir made most great people of the Twentieth Century look meek. Over the years many folks — and especially the blame-Israel-first crowd — have assumed she was either a heartless ideologue or some kind of blood-sucking Zionist vampire (and then, crazily, certain…

Brute Farce

Imagine Dubya slamming shots of Wild Turkey and playing war games on his Crawford, Texas ranch, and you begin to get a picture of Nestor Arenas’s bone-crunching work. The artist uses road kill, action figures, and toy soldiers to cook up photographs depicting a world where violence is the supreme…

“Sweet Bird of Youth”

“Sweet Bird of Youth”: This photo-based exhibit, curated by Claire Breukel, features selections from the Debra and Dennis Scholl collection that focus on an evolution of time and place based on the mundane. Breukel has combined imagery of banal, barren landscapes with the loaded rituals of female adolescence to convey…

Hitchcock on Holiday

To Catch a Thief: Special Collector’s Edition (Paramount) Starring Cary Grant as a cat burglar and Grace Kelly as a hot-to-trot heiress, this is easily one of Alfred Hitchcock’s slightest films, especially coming on the heels of Rear Window; indeed, its idyllic setting on the French Riviera suggests it was…

Lousy Hustler

There was a time in my life when I might have actually enjoyed Pocket Pool a little bit. Back when I was 12, giving myself migraines from staring at scrambled cable porn, the notion of a game where I could “win” pictures of girls in their underwear would’ve seemed pretty…

Our top DVD picks for the week of May 8

Because I Said So! (Universal) Breaking and Entering (Weinstein) The Bridge on the River Kwai: Collector’s Edition (Sony) Cagney & Lacey: The True Beginning (MGM) The Caine Mutiny: Collector’s Edition (Sony) Catch & Release (Sony) Deliver Us From Evil (Lionsgate) Dirty Dancing: Twentieth Anniversary (Lionsgate) Donnie Brasco: Extended Cut (Sony)…

A Wave of Women

Miami Beach is celebrated as a mecca for hot women. On any given Saturday there are throngs of babes in thongs sunning themselves on the sand. Sorry boys, this weekend many of the ladies won’t be waiting for you and your awkward come-ons. In fact most of them will only…

Whatever Mama Wants

Today’s the day to pay homage to the woman who carried you in her belly for nine miserable months, and around the country red roses are flying out of the flower shops. That’s right, it’s Mother’s Day and guess what, uninspired husbands and lame-o kids? Your mama is sick of…

Eye-Opening Flicks

We’d like to assume that most of Miami is Netflixing their monthly quota of high-quality art films. Lord knows there aren’t enough options when it comes to finding a decent screening of non-Hollywood fare. We’d be lost without the Miami Beach Cinematheque and the efforts of Dr. Edward J. Reninger…

Contemporary Choreography

If Swan Lake is not your thang, you may want to give the Ballet Gamonet a whirl. The locally based dance troupe is shaking things up with Program 4, which is sure to thrill your cultural senses. Among the current offerings are two duets. Purple Bend II features same-sex duet…

Chuck’s Baaaack!

The last book tour that brought Chuck Palahniuk to Miami had a reputation for fainting audience members and prop-based theatrics. That book, Haunted, played with literary convention and had a high gross-out factor. Palahniuk’s latest, Rant, plays with literary convention and … hey, wait a minute! Fans of the cult…

Goodbye, Gables

School’s out for Kari Snyder and Lamia Endara, who answer the bell tonight at 7:00 during the opening of the University of Miami’s new Project Space in Wynwood. The freshly minted MFAs will be among students and faculty exhibiting their work at the 3500-square-foot space during rotating monthly shows intended…

Wild About Wynwood

Downtown Miami will come alive with art openings of all varieties this evening. Wear your walking shoes and come prepared to be amazed. At Abba Fine Art (233 NW 36th St.), multimedia artist and experimental composer David McConnell wants to burrow into your head with Polysymphonic Sun, an exhibit opening…

We’re Burning Up

Caribbean parties already have a reputation for being hot. Sexy women in scandalous outfits, island music that vibrates the speakers, and free-flowing cocktails are guaranteed every weekend at Krazy, the bash thrown by the Trini South Boyz at the Yage Bay Club. Tonight the party that attracts hundreds of Caribbean…

Sibling Adaptation

How to explain the combination of Anton Chekhov and Pina Bausch in Sayda Trujillo’s Three Sisters: Awake? It’s like My Dinner with André remade by Baz Lurhmann. Dazed and Confused directed by Quentin Tarantino. Remembrance of Things Past adapted by Sid Vicious. Chekhov’s meditation on human longing has been removed…

Free Your Booty

Miami is home of the bass, where high-riding Chevys cruise down Ocean to the sounds of trunk-rattling booty anthems. Who better to throw a party dedicated to the butt-shaking music than South Florida’s own DMC DJ competition champion, DJ Craze? He’s celebrating our local legacy with Bass Sessions, a party…

Spell It Right

By now, everyone and their mother (sorry, Mom) knows the meaning of the not-really-that-clever acronym MILF. It’s time to get used to the term MILPH — Mother in Life, Passion, and Health — at least, according to MILPH World founder Amy Deming. A clearinghouse for all things related to moms…