Morton’s at Macy’s

If Miami Spice threw any more chef events, we’d have to call it Miami Spice Cabinet. Still, for free cooking tips from some of the area’s best chefs, you can’t beat ’em with a whisk. Coming up at Macy’s in Dadeland Mall on Saturday is chef Edgardo Lopez of Morton’s…

Maternal Bondage

After the death of legendary actress Joan Crawford, her daughter published a book that has gone down as one of the most unflattering tell-alls in history. Cristina Crawford claimed her mother was an alcoholic who was ruthlessly careerist and abusive, capable of attempted strangling, and prone to fits of rage…

Animalistic Behavior

Psychological profiles of serial killers often reveal that they start on their path to evil by torturing small animals. And you don’t have to be a psychologist to know there’s something wrong with anybody who doesn’t like dogs. So unless you don’t mind being mistaken for a murderer, there’s really…

In-Your-Face Fornication

It’s what we’ve all been waiting for, whether we admit it or not: 3-D invading porn. Well, not porn exactly, but definitely eroticism. Who’da thunk it was Red China that spent big money to have bodily fluids appear to float offscreen. OK, so that’s an exaggeration, but there will be…

Mona Meets Miami

We all know what she looks like, but the only way to see the original La Joconde is to take a trip to the Louvre in Paris. Naturally, the most famous painting in the world has been copied and reinterpreted over the centuries. It was this trail of re-imagined portraits…

Bitchy is Back

She’s voluptuous. She wants to make you scream. And, well, she’s a little bitchy. Glam kitten Misty Eyez wouldn’t be caught dead at your grandmother’s bingo game. Instead, she uses her superheroine drag powers to conjure a dash (all right, it’s more of a hearty pour) of sass at Fort…

To Confuse and Offend

When L’Age d’Or screened in 1930, crazed audience members threw ink at the screen and destroyed artworks by Salvador Dalí and Man Ray in the lobby. The uprising could have had something to do with the scene of a girl performing fellatio on a religious statue’s toe. Or it could…

Awaken the Henry Within

William Shakespeare’s plays are well known for their sad soliloquies and tragic endings, and mothers sleeping with their sons, and men dressed as women. But some folks might not appreciate the fact that the Bard also knew how to write stirring, badass, motivational speeches. They can be found mostly in…

Fresh Meat

People wondering when the next homegrown art star will be minted usually cast their peepers at Miami’s New World School of the Arts for its impressive record of producing bumper crops of fresh local talent. Mind you, NWSA is not one of those dippy art school chorizo factories cranking out…

Aim High

Nova Scotia native Rich Aucoin is overly ambitious. For those less talented, that could spell disaster. But for Aucoin, constructing the perfect electro-pop melody just might be an attainable goal. His 2010 EP, Public Publication, features only four cuts, yet it took two years to create and relied on more…

Did Shepard Fairey Deserve to Get Beat Up by Danish Anarchists?

Yesterday, British newspaper the Guardian reported that artist Shepherd Fairey was attacked after a gallery opening in Copenhagen. The 41-year-old artist gained a cult following for his “Andre the Giant Has a Posse” sticker campaign and then crossed over into mainstream consciousness via his iconic Barack Obama “Hope” poster. He…

Downtown Full Moon Party: Fire, Breasts, and Dancing

The monthly Downtown Full Moon Party is ostensibly a holistic journey geared to getting our earthly bodies closer to their spiritual being so they can harmoniously connect with the rhythms of the universe. But it’s really just another excuse to get shit-faced and watch some dude swing a stick of…

Why Local Flash Mobs Make Us Feel Crappy About Miami

Is the below video a dancetastic flash mob or an ad for the Ikea in Sunrise? That store is crowded enough without the added publicity. (If someone doesn’t already know where to buy disposable Swedish home décor, let’s not tell them, okay?) Hats off to choreographer Jackie Vilarino of the…