Nine Best Club Parties on South Beach This Weekend

Holy time-lapse! Where’d January go? February seemingly came out nowhere and that silly little groundhog’s predicting another six weeks of winter. This has been a really crazy week. Oh, and happy Black History Month. Plenty of gnarly shit’s going down this weekend en la playa. And per usual, Crossfade’s wrangled-up…

Nicki Minaj’s “Stupid Hoe” and Five Other Rap Videos Banned by Viacom

Nicki Minaj is too hardcore for BET. Viacom-owned Black Entertainment Television is refusing to air the rapper’s “Stupid Hoe” music video. Evidently, naked Barbie dolls and fishnets are far too risque for the network. We’ve embedded the 210-second, Hype Williams-directed video below. You’ll notice the most offensive element of “Stupid…

Silver Ball, Silver Screen

Prediction: Pinball, a seemingly forgotten pastime once enjoyed by children, teens, and adults alike, will see a worldwide resurgence, particularly a spike among the hip, 15- to 55-year-old demographic, by the end of 2012. We’re basing this forecast entirely on SoundScape Cinema Series’ showing of Tommy this Wednesday at 8…

Major LOLs

After more than half a century and over two dozen Saturday Night Live cast members, Second City continues to celebrate 50 years of improvisational comedy—three years late—with a premeditated tour. Ironic, eh? Founded by Paul Sills, Howard Alk, and Bernie Sahlins, Second City opened its first theater on a “snowy”…

Soul Train‘s Don Cornelius Dead at 75 of an Apparent Suicide

Legendary Soul Train creator and longtime host Don Cornelius has died of an apparent suicide. He was 75 years old. According to the Los Angeles Times, police arrived at Cornelius’s Sherman Oaks home around 4 a.m. PST and transported the Soul Train producer to an area hospital, where he was…

Rolling Stones’ Open-Mouth Urinals Piss Off German Women

Germans are notoriously kinky. But when it comes to watersports, at least 12 Deutsches are drawing a hard line at simulated restroom piss play. According to TMZ, several women have complained about mouth-shaped urinals inside a Rolling Stones memorabilia museum restroom in Germany, calling the porcelain novelty toilet demeaning and…

The Twelve Best Things to Do in Miami This Weekend

Wow, where’d the week go? We were having so much fun blogging that we nearly forgot about the weekend. Turns out, there’s a lot of cool shit going on. Did you know that Miami’s one of the few places where marathons are run in the winter? No, we’re serious. Just…

Ten Best Music-Related Things to Do in Miami This Weekend

Taking a page out of the Shit Miami Girls Says…and guys video, “Bro, we’re getting bottles, bro.” OK, not really. We’re broke. So broke, in fact, that we can barely afford a bottle of beer. The thought of dropping mad loot on a bucket of Goose is ludicrous, especially since…

Rusko Announces Show at the Fillmore Miami Beach on May 19

Odd Future? Snow Patrol? Now Rusko? Holy shit, the Fillmore’s like Miami’s United Nations of live music. Moments ago, Crossfade’s inbox was slapped with a show announcement: Dubstep disc jockey and record producer Rusko is headed to South Beach in May! Following the commercial and critical success of his 2010…

Nine Best South Beach Club Parties This Weekend

Have y’all gotten a head start on this year’s tax return by filing early? How much money are you getting back? Got enough cash to pop bottles with The Boss and party with “The Big Bad Wolf”? Check out Crossfade’s guide to this weekend’s best parties on South Beach. Whether…

Five Embarrassing Presidential Bumps and Bruises

. Dude could probably whoop your ass, most certainly bench-presses more than you, and is undeniably a better hockey player. The 68-year-old Massachusetts senator rocked two black eyes and a broken nose to the State of the Union address this week, the result of a recent pick-up hockey game. Despite…

Hipster Rhymes

If you didn’t catch Theophilus London last summer at the W South Beach’s two-year anniversary party, that’s a shame. If you couldn’t get into the Bing party at the Shelborne during Art Basel or his intimate gig at midtown’s Ricochet Lounge with Nas, double and triple shame. Surely you’ve learned…

No Clowning

Believe it or not, before we started down the journalism path to Alt-Weekly Land, rodeo clown struck us as a glamorous occupation. It was the early ’90s, career day at our elementary school. Firefighters, doctors, and even an embalmer shared their respective lines of work, up-selling their job descriptions to…

Miley Cyrus Loves Penis (Cake)

Miley Cyrus is proving she’s a gangster, a down-for-whatever type of Disney-princess-gone-wild. Over the weekend, the 19-year-old daughter of country music legend Billy Ray Cyrus went down on a massive cock cake during boyfriend Liam Hemsworth’s birthday party at an L.A. club. Photos obtained by TMZ show Miley seductively posing…

Five Freaky Republican Presidential Candidates’ Doppelgängers

The nationwide comedy tour known as the Republican presidential race is in Florida this week. Over several months, rich candidates have perfected the game of politics in their quest for the Republican Party’s nomination and the chance to go up against President Barack Obama in November. Promising horseshit disguised as budget…

Nickelback Reacts to Haters, Crossfade Pushes Buttons

Sticks and stones may break their bones, but words really hurt Nickelback. According to a recent article on rollingstone.com, Nickelback is “annoyed with all this constant ridicule.” They’re sick of taking cheap shots from critics for their lame brand of mainstream radio rock, and they’re especially pissed off about petitions…