Real rock ‘n’ roll is a rough religion. And the danger of living by gloomy catch phrases such as “No future” and “Live fast, die young” usually precludes the possibility of passing gracefully into old age — otherwise known as your 30s. But somehow, despite all of those epic moments…
If the current South Florida thrash scene were a rotting animal carcass, then Vultures are Wolves would be the three-headed scavenger beast sent forth from, as the band describes it, the “disgusting swamps of Miami” to clean up the mess. (Well, maybe I shouldn’t say clean up so much as…
These days it has become exceedingly rare to see a show flyer that’s been produced entirely without the aid of a computer. (I mean, we as a people are so obscenely wired that it seems the next logical step should be embedding a Bluetooth into my skull and/or seamlessly interfacing…
For the average individual, the current anorexic state of the economy can be boiled down to a pair of very basic problems: too little cash and not enough booze. That’s why the forward-thinking folks at Bin No. 18 must be commended for their Bailout Beer program, serving up affordable premium draft…
Stop. Collaborate and listen: Ice is back with a brand-new, um, nothing. Except, well, he’s bringing his old Caucasian rap shtick to the Seminole Casino Hollywood for a free Labor Day weekend show. I mean, obviously it’s free. I wouldn’t pay to see this 41-year-old white boy sing-talk his way…
Planet Earth is a really mean place, and sometimes just stepping out the door can scar sensitive human beings like us. That’s why we need music. It lets us share our feelings while helping to identify the people who aren’t total assholes, such as local bands the Humdrums and the…
If you haven’t traveled to Clubland (AKA Miami Beach) in the past 48 hours, you might not be aware there’s a new party genre in the offing. It’s a little something called “neo-hippie cyberpunk kiddiecore,” and to “get it,” envision a computer-generated Woodstock set in the Neuromancer universe all about…
In the vast suburban everywheres of the North, there is a surplus of Sublime-obsessed white boys who smoke reefer as if it were a bodybuilding supplement for the brain. They jam incessantly, knocking out funky pseudo-ska while backed by their great-aunt’s analog drum machine. And during band breaks, each individual…
Yesterday evening, I found myself in a shadowy corner of the Yard House, a warehouse-style chain restaurant and beer supermarket at Merrick Park. There’s a massive selection of 50-odd pale ales, dark ales, lagers, and more; it’s a garish scene, set to the nerve-squelching strains of so-called classic rock like “Nothing’s…
ince wandering away from the pseudo-industrial barrios of their native Uruguay almost a half-decade ago, the dark, druggy boys of Monoblock — Martin TC and Guikle — have survived and thrived by zigzagging through the secret underground tunnels that connect all international party meccas. Thus far, the techno-house experimentalists have…
Last week, you totally blew it, missing the jumpoff for Dade County hustler Pitbull’s impending album Rebelution. (I mean really … Where is your civic pride? The guy carries the keys to our city.) You missed a backdoor taste of club bangers like “Calle Ocho,” “Hotel Room Service,” and “Krazy”…
As a little runt in the late ’80s, I owned a rabbit’s foot keychain. And really, didn’t everyone? Back then, lucky bunny body parts were still a genuine fixture of pop culture. Today though, the hallowed tradition of carrying a severed rodent’s leg on your person as some sort of…
The endlessly fascinating thing about this flyer for the Obey Your Mastour kickoff party is the oddly erotic moment transpiring between the two humanoid creatures, struggling front and center. To be honest, I can’t fully decode the sequence or nature of whatever’s happening here … I mean, what exactly is…
After courageously conquering hump day, we all deserve a freaking huge party, but for some reason the Man refuses to acknowledge our massive midweek achievement, insisting that everyone keep grinding full-force till Friday evening. Well, we call bullshit on these arch-capitalist scare tactics and shout, “Slackers unite!” It’s time for…
The final, frenzied countdown to party time has begun. In exactly three days, the Magic City’s most discerning club rats — and fanatical apparel collectors — will swarm the Awarehouse for Saturday’s Sweat X Iggy Pop T-Shirt Release. (If you haven’t yet RSVP-ed, get on the list right now. Note:…
The endlessly fascinating thing about this flyer for the Obey Your Mastour kickoff party is the oddly erotic moment transpiring between the two humanoid creatures, struggling front and center. To be honest, I can’t fully decode the sequence or nature of whatever’s happening here … I mean, what exactly is…
No, Calahoney won’t take your dinner order, then wash the dishes. (Although, they might consider it, if you ask nice and promise to buy their album.) Truth is, Josue Cruz and Laura Askins don’t even run a restaurant. They’re a husband-and-wife duo who “teach in the winter and rock in…
Too often some wannabe rock star fancies himself a modern-day shaman, experimenting wildly with every available substance, both legal and not, in pursuit of sonic superpowers. So the fact that Miami indie rappers Heroes on Drugs sound very, very stoned isn’t any big thang. No, the difference here is that…
OMG! You’re so, so ecstatic. It’s crazy that you’re actually gonna be there for Mos Def’s brainy hip-hop throwdown this Saturday at the Arsht. The anticipation is enormous. It’s like pretty, little butterflies dropping happy bombs in your belly every hour on the hour. And, to be honest, you’ve been…
It was 1979 and punk was being born again in the glitter-flecked primordial muck of Los Angeles. Late-blooming skinheads and bands like Black Flag, the Circle Jerks, and the Germs were bashing the West Coast hardcore scene into shape, using little more than blunt force. For most fans of aggro…
Born in the gangsta rap vacuum of the late ’90s, DMX seemed to have a lock on the pop charts. With monster club track “Party Up (Up in Here)” and a five-time platinum album, the Dog was riding real ruff in ’99. And being a true street entrepreneur, he immediately…
In the vaguely menacing gloam of this first dying decade of the 21st century, the people continue to party hard. It’s an obsessive, have-fun-or-die type of mindset that cannot be deterred, no matter the consequences. And to a large extent, Frenchy sensations Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo and Thomas Bangalter of Daft…
