When the economic apocalypse flares up out of nowhere — or from the muck of “subprime mortgages,” if you believe CNBC — what are those of modest means to do? It’s a simple fact that mouths need food and landlords need cash. And while certain reactionaries say we ought to…
Les Misérables By Claude-Michel Schonberg and Alain Boublil. Directed by David Arisco. Through April 5. Actors’ Playhouse at the Miracle Theatre, 280 Miracle Mile, Coral Gables; 305-444-9293; actorsplayhouse.org Truly, the secret to Les Misérables’ stunning success is its target demographic. This is theater for people who do not like theater,…
Any combo of seafood, booze, and shaking your ass sounds like a seriously noxious cocktail, the gastro-intestinal — not to mention social — equivalent of a suicide bomb. Yet leading PhDs of party science appear to have found the perfect fusion of these three superexplosive elements. Their formula: two parts…
For kamikaze comedians, there’s a split-second just before impact when the laugh track gets so crazy that it sounds like someone’s screaming. Too often — in cases such as Lenny Bruce, John Belushi, or Sam Kinison — there’s no time left to bail. But now and again, some drugged-out joker…
The midweek mystery flu is not uncommon. So if you’ve been battling cold chills while coughing up blood and suffering less than stellar erections, resist that premature urge to rush for the emergency room. Trust us — you haven’t contracted some deadly jungle disease requiring immediate medical care or quarantine…
The weekend is a sacred fun zone and no bummers whatsoever will be accepted. Therefore, the following things are unconditionally outlawed: 1) Glowstick fists, 2) drunken emo rants about your ex, and 3) dudes in rhinestone dragon tees. Oh, and another note: The idea of carb-counting — or counting of…
There’s nothing more addictive than the rush of being aboard a world-class racing vessel heeled over at high speed. For true sailing freaks, it’s the kind of buzz that’s categorically better than sex. Sadly, though, big-time boating costs more than a ten-pound bag of natural black pearls. So if you…
Under constant threat from snarky bloggers and 24-hour tabloid television, the average celebrity lifespan has been cut from 15 minutes to mere nanoseconds. The result: a terrorized star population with a mania for “expanding the brand!” And the wired world should probably just surrender, because diversification isn’t only for stockbrokers…
Too short — and split up by the NBA’s annual All-Star weekend — February is a terrible time for basketball. It’s a 28-day full moon, pitted with slump and spontaneous team combustion. For proof, check out the Miami Heat. Before the month even began, our team had lost two of…
In 1994, Winter Party Festival started as a one-off charity blowout benefiting the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) community. Now, a decade and a half later, the yearly bash has become a massive weeklong frenzy of 10,000 international guests flash-mobbing 25 events split among Miami, the Beach, and Fort…
Sick of sleazy opulence? Worn down by the strains of sweet talk and looking pretty? Now and again, the pleasures of the nightlife game can suck the swagger from any player. Even pimp legend Iceberg Slim sometimes felt “teased, tormented, and brutalized.” In these cases, slap therapy must be applied…
Huge hair, ludicrous nicknames, and scripted trash talk have become the strange trademarks of boxing in America. For haters, these are the signs of decline. Meanwhile, for fans raised on pro wrestling and tabloids, today’s game is a perfect mix of prizefighting and freak show. It’s a rift that can…
