Gabrielle Redfern could probably pull it off, but If Carlos Gimenez, Roosevelt Bradley, Marcelo Llorente, Julio Robaina, or José “Pepe” Cancio hit the streets of downtown Miami at 2 a.m. and went to a couple of clubs they’d probably get looked at like police, creeps, narcs, drunk lawyers, or weirdos…
Are there rich South Americans in town or are locals buying up all the art in Wynwood? Whatever the case, the gallery walls on Saturday’s art walk were full of red dots signifying sales. Now some young Picasso will be able to afford a ham sandwich and quit thinking about…
A seven-trey Chevrolet rolls up to a ’66 Bonneville, spits on its windshield, kicks it in the rims, rips off its spoiler, breaks an axle, and dents the doors. The Bonneville strikes back, chucking spark plugs through the windows, cutting off the break lines, snatching the motor mounts, and leaving…
Smoke pon de chalawa. Three decades ago today, Bob Marley’s essence floated off into the most high like a purple cloud of ganja smoke.We won’t get into the details of his death, except to say: Let’s continue to fight cancer. And let’s celebrate the life of the greatest musical ambassador…
Lil Jon, even Donald Trump respects his hustle. But the master of Crunk is more than just your favorite celebrity apprentice. And this Wednesday night at LIV, the Atlanta-based business mogul will be sliding through the Dirty Hairy party and bringing all his “Whaaaaat’s!!!,” “Yeeeeaaah’s!!!,” and “Okaaayyy’s!!!” with him. Truth…
You may know Michelle Bombshell McGee as that “filthy whore” who stole Sandra Bullock’s husband Jesse James. But she’s really just an entrepreneur working for a dollar in this crazy world. As a fetish model, feature dancer, video girl, dominatrix for hire, and sex conventioneer you can catch her online,…
We the People thank Mexico for all they’ve given us. Like, Texas, Arizona, and yeah, New Mexico. They didn’t actually give us all that land, you say? Fuhgeddaboutit, we’re taking their holidays too.Mexican parties are fucking awesome. In los Estados Unidos, Cinco De Mayo is synonymous with taco nights, tequila…
It’s Saturday night. The Marlins just smacked the hell out of the Nationals. And now you need autotune. And lots of it. Luckily, Teddy Paine is in the building. His Cash Money buddy Jay Sean is there too. And together, they will provide more electronically manipulated vocals than most stadiums…
What’s got six strings, four hands, a kit full of skins, and a fuzz box? The Deaf Poets, a two-man band from the MIA featuring guitarist-songwriter Sean Wouters and drummer Nicolas Espinosa.The duo’s catchy garage sound tempers lo-fi wildness with digital recording value for an ear-friendly dose of modern rock…
News flash: Old white guy confuses KKK with NAACP.So, is veteran TV reporter Michael Putney uncomfortable with the sight of two black candidates running for Miami-Dade County mayor?A factual error made by the newsman while serving as moderator at a political debate suggests that possibility.While rephrasing a comment made by…
Graffiti: The art of marking a surface to convey a message. Poetry: The echoes of the sound of your synapse relays crackling.Combine the two and you’ve got poetry bombing, the method Agustina Woodgate is using to realize her project for the O, Miami poetry festival.For the past month, the artist…
The Inkheads are a world famous Miami graffiti crew whose work stretches back to the ’80s. They were featured and interviewed in the first issue of 12 oz. Prophet, the first full-color graffiti magazine, which was produced in Miami. Jel Martinez has been throwing tags since the fifth grade, and…
Beneath that perfect smile, flat tummy, shapely hips, and dancer’s thighs beats the heart of an ass-shaking warrior. And by the time you see the final performance of the Miami Dolphins Cheerleader Auditions at Aventura Mall this Sunday, more than 200 young ladies will have already been eliminated. For the…
Karaoke … Miami fuckin’ loves that shit. And right now, it’s time to celebrate. This is National Karaoke Week, people. Yes, the art of performance over pre-recorded instrumentals has its own holiday. People get on a mic, belt out their favorite tunes, and live the rock star fantasy in front…
Billy Corben doesn’t get high, but he does believe in weed, man. Last week, after a 4/20 screening of Rakontur’s new documentary Square Grouper, about the mega-ton pot smuggling scene in Everglades City, the director offered his opinion on the decriminalization of marijuana. “I don’t think the federal government should…
The wilderness is tough for a real party animal. One time our friend the zebra walked into a bar and asked, “Can I get a red stripe?” The bartender looked up and said, “We don’t serve Jamaicans here.” We broke that snarky bastard’s ribs, smashed every bottle on the top…
Who would win a bare-knuckle cage fight between Ringo Starr and Keith Richards? We’re not sure. Richards has survived every narcotic known to man, and Ringo is the greatest pop music drummer ever. We’re pretty sure they’d just punch each other in the face till they ran out of breath,…
Smoke ’em if you got ’em.Possessing less than 28 grams of marijuana could soon be legal in Miami-Dade County if Luther Campbell gets elected.Thanks, dude.His other proposals include countywide gambling (to fund education), a tax on strippers’ assets (OK, actually a license fee), and construction job sites that reflect a…
Before Wayne Brady’s dinner-theater shows this weekend, will he pull a drive-by, “choke a bitch,” or snap a street cop’s neck? We hope so. Those are three stunts he executed in just one sketch as a guest on Dave Chappelle’s comedy show, which made violence funny again. The gags countered…
“I’m signing my life away in the church,” Uncle Luke said as he prepared his election documents for notarization. The reality candidate sat in the headquarters of WMBM radio studios in the New Birth Baptist Church close to his Liberty City birthplace.”I’m gonna need God on my side. I’m gonna need all…
The New Times sure does write a lot about the Borscht Film Festival. We’ve given them cash money, triple coverage, and more words than a Scrabble factory.But think of what they’ve done for us. Their movement represents more than a single night of local independent film per year. Borscht is…
The Lee Boys at the Stage April 8
