For a few years, I’ve harbored a strange obsession with Major League journeyman reliever Jorge Julio. Not because he’s very good, mind you. In fact, the current Milwaukee Brewer is one of the most consistently awful players to make a big-league roster every year. His career is a testament to the…
Hey, remember back in April when Dwyane Wade’s former business partner Richard von Houtman unleashed a Riptide smear tirade against the Miami Heat superstar?Von Houtman, one of Wade’s partners in the thwarted D Wade’s Place restaurant chain, cast Wade as a naive businessman, controlled by his entourage, who cheated on…
On Thursday, TV personality, beach canoodler, and sometime Catholic priest Alberto Cutié joined the Episcopal Church. His official reason: He had “searched [his] soul and sought God’s guidance.” Of course, the fact that Episcopal priests are allowed to marry (and, we assume, canoodle) had absolutely nothing to do with his…
OK, so maybe it wasn’t pure altruism, but Jose Canseco getting beaten down by a Korean giant almost saved Lindsay Lohan’s dad from the physical wrath of Riptide. Almost. In May, I wrote about Canseco’s boxing tour coming to South Florida, giving every resident with 50 bucks the chance to…
Last December, New Times went deep into the strange world of Miami’s lawless exotic rental car market- a niche industry that seems to attract more than its fair share of fly-by-night hustlers. One of our wierdest encounters revolved around Exoticars, a tiny store on the ground-floor of the dingy Bays…
Look, we know The University of South Florida is in Tampa, but it’s called The University of South Florida for Christ’s sake, so we’re claiming jurisdictional purview over the following video of an endless rain-delay danceoff that erupted yesterday between that school’s baseball squad and UConn. It’s Friday, Goddamnit…
Daoud Tafari emerges from his Liberty City home holding in each massive sweaty hand a glass full of a pink beverage and ice. It tastes a lot more… natural than pink lemonade. “Don’t worry about what it is,” Tafari orders in his deep, enunciated brogue, which sounds not unlike KRS-One’s…
Last week, Craigslist scrapped its “Erotic Services” category after one too many murderers used it to lure victims to their deaths. But petty criminals should not despair: There are still plenty of ways to skirt/break the law on the free classifieds website. Our hero this week shall be identified only…
Severe depression and the Calder Race Course go hand in hand. If you’ve just finalized your divorce or gotten fired from the United States Postal Service, we recommend you take a trip to Miami Gardens and visit the dilapidated, smoke-filled stuck-in-the-70s environs where a solid majority of the resident addicts…
“Hmmmm, I wonder what happened to that unremarkable but sturdy backup catcher that played for the Fish through the turn of the millenium?”Ponder no further, friend. Mike Redmond spent twelve years with the Florida Marlins organization, including seven- from 1998 to 2004- with the big team. He’s the consummate backup,…
Fatal accident on Tamiami Trail puts Miccosukee Police under scrutiny
Miami FC’s Cuban Connection
It’s not often you hear about a new magazine launching. But then, Local Mug Shots operates under a different sort of business model: The writing is minimal/nonexistent, the photography is free, and its most important contributors grace the pages against their will. We just got our copy of Volume I…
As reported in “Renegade Road,” New Times’ feature published today about the suspicious secrecy surrounding a tribal police department’s handling of a fatal car accident, Miccosukee cops have not uttered public word one about the death of Tatiana Furry.Unless you count a deeply unprofessional rant on a gossipy law enforcement message…
Just after 11 AM, Riptide encountered this minutes-old accident on Arthur Godfrey Road between Sheridan and Pinetree Drive. From what a Miami-Dade Fire Rescue paramedic who declined to give his name told us, an elderly man driving a Toyota Yaris (he’s pictured after the jump, with a paramedic touching his…
Miami native Jose Canseco has made a post-baseball career out of snitching on his former teammates and getting punched in the face. This is not a dignified existence. And yet he insists on respect. Every time evidence emerges that a star did ‘roids, he has to point out that he…
We here at Riptide firmly believe we have the finest readers in all of South Florida. They’re a lot like us, actually: loud, remarkably angry, hilarious, and stunningly handsome. Case in point: a ready-to-publish article we received from a reader who had witnessed some bad-timing Earth Day plastic disposal going…
Miami’s Sex Offender Village from Miami New Times on Vimeo. We long ago gave up on getting any credit from larger media outlets piggybacking on our sex-offenders-under-the-bridge scoop — the story that made the rest of the nation recognize Miami-Dade County’s supreme fucked-up-ness. The terrible situation is bigger than one…
Something tells us that if Shaquille “Kobe, Tell Me How my Ass Taste” O’Neal has heard of Liberty City flea market rapper Geisha, he’s a fan. It’s Friday morning, as good a time as any to post the new ditty that has all the kids singing along… about arching up…
Look at that face to the right there. Just look at it. Don’t you wanna punch it? And don’t even try to harp on how that face was right about steroids and yadda, yadda, yadda. We, for some unfathomable reason, read most of the second book written by that face…
The Guantánamo torture memos were released last week, allegedly ushering in a new age of government transparency. Riptide aims to cut the crap on a local level, too, beginning with our own self-aggrandizing cops. Nearly every police department has some warm and friendly motto to adorn the sides of its…
Depending on who you ask, swine flu is either the 12 Monkeys virus come to scour the earth of humanity, or it’s an overhyped limited-scope bug that the media has recklessly sensationalized. Though we’re inclined to believe it’s the latter- – those media sure are scumbags — we still don’t…
