David Strecker was returning from a vacation in the Dominican Republic this past October 30 when U.S. Customs officials at Miami International Airport told him to line up with six other people and hand over his electronics. The Key West resident dutifully surrendered a laptop computer, two cell phones, and…
Susan Miller, astrologer to the stars, waltzed into the Fontainebleau on Friday night with some very bad news. Most of the 40 or so people in attendance for her annual Year Ahead lecture were Libras, and 2014 would mark the most trying period of their lives. “Reach over to the…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Think literary events are for snobs? Such an assessment would make you an awful person, although this year’s Miami International Book Fair did just get decidedly more dickish. Former vice president and current cowboy-hat enthusiast Dick Cheney’s imminent appearance was announced yesterday in a news release, leaving mere days for…
Lou Panick dreams of YouTube stardom. The only thing holding this wannabe prankster back is that he can’t come up with a single idea beyond harassment. Most of his uploads revolve around assaulting pedestrians or making offensive comments about women on Miami Beach. It’s all typical juvenile fare that no…
The cops arrived at about 6 a.m. in the morning, waking up Felix Conde’s sleeping sons. Seven officers forcibly entered the home and peeked into bathrooms and closets, searching for a single dog named Lucky. He wasn’t there. A week earlier, the 3-year-old pet was moved to an animal trainer’s…
A cavalcade of Hummers and F-150s headed down to the University of Miami on Saturday. They contained scantily clad female models bearing bullhorns, beer pong tables and boxes of pizza. Bros instantly materialized, got drunk and danced to the sounds of DJ Joey. And because no tailgate would be complete…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Florida’s convoluted gun laws are up for debate today, although not really. It kind of just felt nice to say that for a second. It’s true that the criminal justice subcommittee of the Florida House of Representatives will hold a five-hour hearing about Stand Your Ground, among other things. However,…
Lou Panick dreams of YouTube stardom. The only thing holding this wannabe prankster back is that he can’t come up with a single idea beyond harassment. Most of his uploads revolve around assaulting pedestrians or making offensive comments toward women on Miami Beach. It’s all typical, juvenile fare that no…
Since at least 2004, Club Madonna owner Leroy Griffith has been clamoring to overturn a ban on adult entertainment venues serving alcohol on South Beach. It’s unfair, he says, that he has to serve ARIEL wine and O’Doul’s at his strip joint when others across the causeway can be one-stop-shops…
The luckiest human being in the world lives in Florida. A 67-year-old Florida man has now won the Lotto jackpot not once, but twice. To reiterate: Someone won $10 million last year by guessing a random set of six numbers. This person — not you — collected another $3 million…
Halloween in Florida can feel redundant since living in the Sunshine State is often inherently a horror story. All future slasher and disaster flicks should be filmed here. For one, the people are usually coated in sweat and tears (no makeup artists required), and the fauna includes sharks, alligators, and…
Halloween in Florida can feel redundant since living in the Sunshine State is often inherently a horror story. All future slasher and disaster flicks should be filmed here. For one, the people are usually coated in sweat and tears (no makeup artists required), and the fauna includes sharks, alligators, and…
At the risk of sounding like a D.A.R.E officer, it’s common knowledge that taking molly is a little like playing Russian roulette with your system. Perhaps because it’s marketed as the luxury brand of chemicals, it’s almost considered gauche to ask what’s in it. Or, on the other hand, maybe…
Since July, one petition has been Florida dope-smokers’ great white hope. By August, People United for Medical Marijuana had already collected 100,000 signatures from people who favor medicinal weed. That milestone meant an amendment to legalize medical marijuana would appear before the Florida Supreme Court. By the latest count three…
One of the world’s foremost conspiracy theorists doesn’t want people to get the wrong impression when they Google his name. “Mind Control: The Ultimate Terror”? Fine. “New (Reptilian) World Order”? Hey, he wrote that article. But calling him an “American loon”? That’s cause for a libel suit, according to Uri…
It’s been almost a month since the Health Care Exchange opened, and it’s still extremely difficult to create an account. Although the primary issue on October 1st seemed to be a glitch with some drop-down menus, that technical difficulty has been smoothed over. It’s the very next part — the…
Halloween came a little early for New Yorkers this season, or at the very least, some of them were given a second excuse to gorge on candy. Apparently, there’s a “weed fairy,” and she’s using social media to spread a very chill message. On Friday, the internet lit up with…
Self-taken photos are — as a general rule — of no use or interest to anyone but the narcissistic subject. From the era of Myspace angle shots to the age of the Instagram duck face, this has been a true, verifiable fact. A Florida high school student has just shattered…
It’s not uncommon for people to toss their relatives’ ashes in the Atlantic during a Florida sunset. Some rabid football boosters even request to have their remains be scattered in the Swamp. Others who are fans of neither metaphors nor SEC sports sometimes seek eternal rest in shopping malls. At…
One of the world’s foremost conspiracy theorists doesn’t want people to get the wrong impression when they Google his name. “Mind Control: The Ultimate Terror”? Fine. “New (Reptilian) World Order”? Hey, he wrote that article. But calling him an “American loon”? That’s cause for a libel suit, according to Uri…
