Forget about Shark Week. Your mission for this weekend: Live every day like you're Beyonce.
Is there any better role model for Miami partying than Queen Bey? Not lately. Recent weeks have seen The Artist Formerly Known as Sasha Fierce checking out art in Wynwood, partying with Diddy, and crashing fans' karaoke sessions all around town. There's no reason you can't do the same, especially with all the fun stuff happening in the 305 throughout the next three days.
So throw on your finest freakum dress, put up the partition in your limo (or just grab a cab), and prepare for a flawless weekend. Here's how to get started.
Antony & Cleopatra: Tarell Alvin McCraney, Miami's own Genius grant winner, brings a Haitian remix of Shakespeare's classic to the Colony Theater. It's in partnership with GableStage, New York's Public Theater, and the Royal Shakespeare Company, so you know it's the real deal.
Chippendales: Magic Mike meets Miami -- in the, um, flesh.
Miami City Ballet: Or maybe you prefer your dancers in tutus over thongs. Whatever.
Second Saturday Art Walk: Retrace Bey and Jay's steps in Wynwood -- getting cultured in the process.
Medical Marijuana Benefit Concert: For granny's sake, give weed a chance.
Billy Joel: The Piano Man himself hasn't exactly aged well, but his songs are still classics.
Save Haiti Bike Ride: Four years after the earthquake that devastated Haiti, the country still needs your help.
Holy Ghost!: Disco down at Bardot.
Natalie Merchant: Show up for a "Wonder"-ful time, and she'll probably "Thank You." (See what we did there?)
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
Mixtape 2: '90s nostalgia meets Miami theater in a series of short plays.
Follow Ciara LaVelle on Twitter @ciaralavelle.
Send your story tips to Cultist at firstname.lastname@example.org.