Last weekend was an overstyled festival of vanity as Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week Swim swept through South Beach. When it was over, "you better werk" turned into "no, really, you better work or your boss is gonna be super pissed." Without any bikini beauties around, life sure felt ugly.
But here's the good news: It's the weekend, and this one's packed with events that'll make you forget all your troubles. And unlike last weekend's extravaganza of bouncing breasts and visible ribcages, these probably won't even give you additional body image issues. Hooray!
(There's also yet another fashion event, just in case yesterday's Fifty Shades of Grey trailer release has you feeling extra masochistic.)
- Sara Bareilles: She wants to see you be brave. Honestly.
- Fashion X Music: Hyde Beach pairs designers from Ann Turk and Johanna Castillo with live DJ sets and all the fancy stuff you expect at the SLS. Oh, and there's an open bar from 9-10 p.m. RSVP to firstname.lastname@example.org.
- Viernes Culturales: Little Havana's got culture too, bro.
- Goombay Festival: Guzzle a few Kaliks and get down to junkanoo in celebration of Bahamian culture.
- Años Dificiles (Difficult Years): The Arsht brings famed Argentine playwright Roberto Cossa's work to the stage.
- Diplo: Have you met your untz quota this week?
We Believe Local Journalism is Critical to the Life of a City
Engaging with our readers is essential to Miami New Times's mission. Make a financial contribution or sign up for a newsletter, and help us keep telling Miami's stories with no paywalls.
Support Our Journalism
- Domino Tournament: Shuffle dem bones at Jimmy'z Kitchen.
- Finnegan's River Farewell Party: The bro-tastic waterfront venue is hosting its last-ever last call with -- what else? -- a pool party.
- Fashion Happy Hour: Missing Swim Week? Dry your couture tears at The Catalina.
- Rockers Movement Summer Cool Down Concert: Lord knows we all need some cooling down. Might as well do it with Cultura Profecta.
Follow Ciara on Twitter @ciaralavelle.
Send your story tips to Cultist at email@example.com.