- Local
- Community
- Journalism
Support the independent voice of Miami and help keep the future of New Times free.
After doing a little bit of research for this week's weekend guide, we came to the startling realization that America has been doing it all wrong.
See, because in Brazil, there is an entire pageant show for the ladies with more butt than they know what to do with.
You could are argue that it's distasteful and objectifying women, but if that's your beef, have a cocktail and relax. It's all in good fun.
Here now are the ten best things to do in Miami this weekend, which, of course, include lots of bumbum.
Friday
Gianni Versace: Don't worry, Yeezy won't be there to ruin it and call it ver-say-cee.
Miss Bumbum: Unlike Miss America, Miss Bumbum wants world peace and a suitable collection of lacy lingerie.
Dave Matthew's Band: Crash into me, but please don't ruin my buzz.
Saturday
Star Slinger: Ginger got beatz.
Kate Simko: Domestic EDM: Detroit techno and Chicago house.
Drag Queen Bingo Night: Girl! Drag B-I-N-G-O spells F-A-B in Queen.
Sunday
311: It's like middle school all over again
Marilyn Manson: Creepy, and from Florida, natch.
Colombian Independence Festival: Where my Colombianos at?
Miami Beach Bruthaz Conference: "Conference," PAHAHA!
Follow Alex on Twitter @ARodWrites.
Follow Cultist on Facebook and Twitter @CultistMiami.
Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.
