You'll never hear us speak ill of the pitchers of domestic beer and the worn bowling shoes at places like Bird Bowl or Holiday Bowling. They're a great suburban escape from the overpriced cocktails and attitude overkill found around Miami and Miami Beach. But if Miami's nightlife scene knows how to do something well, it's take the seemingly mundane and inoffensive, and turn it to a shit show — er, excuse me, Total Split Show.
"Josh Wagner, [director of
As an entertainer for the Opium Group, Profera perfected his skill keeping the crowds engaged, eventually breaking out with Juleisy y Karla, bearded drag queen duo that took Hialeah
However, at Total Split Show, which happens every Monday night at Basement Miami at the Miami Beach Edition, Karla is absent. "She's under house arrest for prostituting on Biscayne," jokes Profera. (In reality, Garcia is taking time off to do his own thing, according to
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So what keeps Total Split Show from turning into an actual shit show?
If you want to get your hand on Profera's balls, all you need to do is fork over $20 for one of three seatings at 9 p.m., 10:30 p.m., and midnight on Monday nights. The cover includes access to the lanes and bowling shoes. You can also take advantage of Basement's ice-skating rink after the game for no additional fee. There are also two-for-one drinks from 8 to 10 p.m., $10 frozen drinks, and $150 bottle specials, in case you feel like blowing your load early in the week.
Gio's Total Split Show with Juleisy and Pin Tits. Every Monday at Basement Miami, 2901 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Free cover; $20 to bowl. RSVP to play at firstname.lastname@example.org. For more information, call 786-641-7119 or visit basementmiami.com.