The best time of the week is finally here — the weekend. The next three days are filled with music, art, parties, and boozy beverages galore. From Coral Gables to Little Havana to South Beach, these are the best places to be until the sun comes up Monday morning.
- Pride Week: Bust out your best wig, gold lamé briefs, or rainbow attire, 'cause it's Pride Week. The crown jewel of any Pride event is the parade: Be on South Beach by noon Sunday to watch colorful floats and even more colorful dancers and characters strike some proud poses on Ocean Drive. The Miami Beach Gay Pride Festival will continue in Lummus Park after the parade.
- Big Smoke at Fontainebleau Miami Beach: Nothing says "I'm rich" quite like a fat cigar lodged in the middle of a toothy grin. So if you're loaded (or just want to look like you are), spend a day with tobacco experts at the Big Smoke. A ticket gets you 36 premium cigars; a luxurious buffet; cocktails and spirits sponsored by Dewar's, D'Ussé, and Bacardi 8; and the chance to rub shoulders with the best cigar makers in the industry, such as Litto Gomez of La Flor Dominicana, maker of Cigar Aficionado's number one cigar of 2016.
- Tortuga Music Festival at Fort Lauderdale Beach Park: Two cities so close shouldn't be so different. Yet a mere 30 miles from the EDM- and hip-hop-obsessed Miami, Fort Lauderdale hosts country music festivals. The Tortuga Music Festival brings acts such as Luke Bryan, Chris Stapleton, and Kenny Chesney to a sandy stage in Broward to benefit Rock the Ocean — an organization raising money for ocean research and education. If country isn't your thing, Nelly, Slightly Stoopid, and other hip-hop, blues, and roots groups are slated to perform. Plus, the same sun and beach exist on that side of the Dade-Broward line.
- Jazz Roots: From Ma Rainey to Miles Davis at Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts: Stevie Ray Vaughan has been called a living legend, and Steve Miller's songs are a staple of your parents' early adulthood, which tells you these two musicians have not only been around for a while but also were successful because they're scholars of their genre. That's why the Jazz Roots series is featuring a tribute to the blues, From Ma Rainey to Miles Davis: A Blues Journey. Watching these two classic-rock gods share the music that inspired them isn't just a nice thing to do for your dad either. The night is sure to be educational and mind-blowing.
- Cheap Miami Tape Release Party at Gramps: If you were born early enough in the '90s, you might remember your first cassette tape. If you were born before the '90s, you probably had the pleasure of painstakingly recording a mixtape on a cassette. For those of you who lived the struggle, the Cheap Miami Tape Release Party is your kind of nostalgic fest. The Velocity Gospel, Fat Sun, Johnny Mile & the Kilometers, Analog, and Fulltime Mötherfucker are the bands featured on four albums being released on tape. Bring your Walkman, enjoy a drink, support local bands, and even get a custom mixtape made onsite.
- 2 Poetry 2 Ferrari at Primary Projects: What do Miamians love more than poetry? Pretty much anything. So why not merge poetry with a sexy dead actor and a fast, expensive car to get people's juices flowing? That was arguably David Landsberger's thought process when he decided to remake 2 Fast 2 Furious with a poetic theme. 2 Poetry 2 Ferrari is the name of not only his film but also the O, Miami party preceding its filming. A limited-edition zine will be available while supplies last, and a commemorative reading for the dearly departed Paul Walker will take place inside a white Ferrari.
- Nufonia Must Fall at Olympia Theater: Sometime after 1984 but before 2008, robots went from horrifying apocalypse catalysts to adorable surrogates for human emotion. Adding to the latter category is the graphic-novel-turned-live-action-animation by Kid Koala, Nufonia Must Fall. In this elaborately performed and projected puppet production, a robot falls in love with an office worker after a chance encounter. Kid Koala and the Afiara Quartet provide a live soundtrack to the story, which unfolds via K.K. Barrett's production design. This undeniably unique show is sure to give you all the feels.
- "Word Play: An Exhibition of Text-Based Artworks" at Laundromat Art Space: From comic books to conceptual paintings, language and art have been commingling for decades. And because April is National Poetry Month, the Laundromat is opening "Word Play" — an exhibit of three artists working with words in mediums ranging from painting and sculpture to video installation. If literature isn't your forte, give this show a chance; you'll seem bookish without reading more than three words at a time.
- Hatch Miami at Coral Gables Museum: Historically, women run the marketplace. Their hands pick the fruit and weave the fabric to feed and clothe the children. The three entrepreneurial females behind Hatch Miami, an outdoor market of fabulous DIY proportions, know this firsthand. Set to take place during Family Day on Aragon at the Coral Gables Museum, it's the perfect place to catch a kid-friendly performance and buy locally sourced products — from jellies and jams to vintage jackets — made by Miami’s female marketplace masters and moms who make magic.
- Keith Johns at the Barnacle Historic State Park: It's not always easy to please your mom. Is one measly brunch enough to thank her for the years of putting up with your brattitude? It sure is not. So why not take her to the Barnacle Society's presentation of Miami folk artist Keith Johns under the stars on the bay. His emotional jams and soulful voice will have Mom feeling the grateful vibes you long to give her.
- Chase the Jaguar at Ricky's: Ricky’s South Beach is like a playground for nostalgic adults who happen to be craving cotton candy. The '80s-themed bar offers craft beverages and classic American cuisine with a side of arcade games and beer pong. This week, Fort Lauderdale indie band Chase the Jaguar will mix rock styles while the bartender mixes your cocktail with the same satisfactory results.
- Maker Faire Miami at Miami Dade College Wolfson Campus: Ice cream was invented in the 17th Century, and the course of history was altered forever. But don't get too depressed imagining the world before the frozen treat. Instead, imagine the inventions yet to change our lives for the better; then check out Maker Faire Miami to see them in real life. The two-day event will include self-driving cars built by Miami Dade College students, as well as hundreds of other inventions and DIY innovations. You'll be able to tell your grandkids about the first time you saw an unmanned vehicle right before you're terminated by the robot rebellion.
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