Audio By Carbonatix
Everyone from Shakespeare to Stephen King has been rehashing these female stereotypes archetypes, so we weren’t surprised when we also found them in Miami’s street murals. To the uninitiated, these graffiti gals might look like a blur of T&A, but we’re here to point out the telling subtleties.
1. The Bimbo
She’s cute, but after she wrecked her car, you had to explain that those trees she kept swerving away from were just her pine-scented air freshener.
2. The Bad Girl
This girl doesn’t think twice about disrobing in public and getting down with some
alien scum. In high school, you could find her behind the 7-11. As an
adult, she’s got her sticky fingers all over lipgloss at Sephora. And
she ain’t paying.
3. The Mother
Two words: birthing hips. One more word: wow.
4. The Shrew
Their scowls and independence threaten nearby
graffiti dudes and is often met with “Know what they need? A good lay.”
5. The Hooker with a Heart of Gold
You know the type: a vixen in the bedroom who also gives great hugs and
is a great listener. Last seen having a picnic with Bigfoot and the Loch
Ness monster.
6. The Tomboy
Like shrews, these dames inspire ire in males and concern in mothers.
In reality, they just use the hours most gals spend straightening
their hair on world domination.
7. The Child
Women are only as worthy as they are young, right? High five, guys! So
keep donning the diapers, ladies. Nipples should point up, and quiet cooing is
a must.
8. The Virgin
Ready for the big irony? Even with all the exposed nipples, innocence is prized über alles.
