Audio By Carbonatix
There’s all kinds of porn out there: barely legal, BBW, S&M, midget, puffy nips, Japanese rope bondage, furry, pegging, bukkake, and twink. Alt-pornographer Bruce LaBruce kick-started skin flicks for counterculture with movies like the Melbourne International Film Festival-banned L.A. Zombie (plot: a homeless schizophrenic thinks he’s a alien zombie who can bring the dead back to life with gay sex) and Bruce and Pepper Wayne Gacy’s Home Movies (John Wayne Gacy’s kids’ pornographic home movies).
But we’d like to add some suggestions to that most annoying of adult sub-genres, Hipster Porn. So in honor of our tireless coverage of Exxxotica 2011, here are 10 porns we think hipster kids would like to bang their hip bones to:
Pabst Blue Ribbed for Her Pleasure
Let’s just hope the only thing skinny on the guys in this porn are the jeans.
Androgyny on Androgyny
Who’s the boy and who’s the girl? It doesn’t matter. Just so long as there’s plenty of David Bowie gender confusion and visible rib cages, someone will get off.
Urban Outtfisters
They live in Williamsburg, they’re gay, and they love your bony ass.
Pitchfuck
Lots of hardcore to a soundtrack by Arcade Firecrotch and TUnE-yArDs. “What’s the business, yeah…”
Ray Bangs
This one follows women who get down for a free pair of Wayfarer sunglasses.
Spike Is Jonzing
Your cock…and a line of coke.
Thick Rimmed Asses
All the dirty deeds are performed while wearing Elvis Costello-esque glasses.
Hipster FistHer
The adult community gets revenge on the grifter.
Mustache Rides
Dudes with handlebar facial pubes get it on to Muskrat Love.
Fat Republican Tea Baggers Listen to Justin Beiber Naked while Talking About How Much They Love Jesus and Taking Showers
It’s sexy because its totally unsexy to a hipster. How ironic!
Fin.
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