Audio By Carbonatix
The Miami Heat beat the Orlando Magic Wednesday night 120-92. Miami was once again down Dwyane Wade, who sat out the game because of that same damn knee. James Jones started and proceeded to drop 17 points while shooting 5-7 from three-point range. LeBron James led the Heat with 21 points, six rebounds, and seven assists in just 29 minutes of action.
The Heat jumped out to a 16-0 lead before the Magic stormed back to tie the game at 31 all. For a minute, it looked like Orlando might put up a fight and make the Heat work for its fifth straight win. The Magic was hyped, the crowd got into it, people in Orlando were like, “Ohhhyeaaaaazzz, COMEBACK!”
THEN SMACK!
SHITTIEST MAGIC TRICK EVER!
The Heat turned a five-point halftime lead into a 28-point David Blaine ice pick to the Magic’s throat, outscoring Orlando 66-43 after the intermission. Aaron Affalo (a person who plays for the Magic) hit seven threes on his way to 30 points. Stan Van Gundy had no answers for the Heat’s second-half defensive pressure. Also, Stan Van Gundy is tall, black, and goes by “Jacque Vaughn” now, so that’s weird.
Once again, Erik Spoelstra threw all fucks to the wind and played everyone on the Heat payroll except Joel Anthony, but he doesn’t count, because at this point the Heat is just kinda stuck with him. After going 8-9 the night before, Chris Bosh went 7-10 and once again barely cracked 20 minutes of the floor.
It’s gonna really, really, REALLY suck for everyone when the Miami Heat starts trying.
So that wasn’t very entertaining, at least the Heat play…
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Dammit, the Heat plays the Magic again this Saturday.
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