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The end of the year is nigh, and it’s time to wave goodbye to 2011 with one hand, while taking a gulp of your finest bubbly with the other. Some sad sacks are happy to celebrate the New Year countdown à-la-sofa with Dick Clarke’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve and a little Korbel for good luck. But this is Miami, bitches — we invented the outrageously overpriced, flamboyant-for-no-reason club night. At the other end of the celebration spectrum, the privileged few (and their faux-privileged, credit card debt-laden friends) will spare no expense when it comes to ringing in 2012 à-la-carte and in high style.
From cutting a Persian rug well into the wee hours of the first day of the year, to feasting like a king on Bacchanalia — or both — here’s the skinny on the fattest, most extravagant New Years Eve parties in town this year.
The Setai will be celebrating with a Moroccan-themed soiree, Midnight in
Marrakech. Shell out $695 and you can indulge in a six-course meal with
menu highlights the likes of duck foie gras, cold poached Maine
lobster, and black truffle soup. Buddha Bar Paris’ DJ Sam Popat will be
flying in from the City of Lights to entertain patrons under Bedouin
tents. If that’s not enough, you can always opt to be entertained by
ubiquitous belly dancers and tarot card readers. I mean, who doesn’t
love a good theme party? It would be like senior prom all over again,
minus the vodka-filled water bottle hidden in your suit pocket.
To see and be seen, head over to the Fontainebleau where you’ll most
likely rub elbows with the celebrity in-crowd and not-so-famous but filthy
rich socialites. See out 2011 at the poolside lounge with a live
performance by Swedish House Mafia’s DJ Axwell. Access to this exclusive
event will set you back no less than $375, but hey, with an open bar,
you’ll be poppin’ bottles well into oblivion and not even care…at least
until you set your no-longer-booze-impaired sights on your January credit card
statement.
WET at the W South Beach is hosting Jacked NYE 2012 along with Dutch
master of synth Afrojack and Bobby Burns. Private cabanas start at a
cool $9,675 — this option will rightfully make you feel all VIP and
segregate you from the general admission crowd, which, by the way, is
priced at $387. This grand poolside fête includes open bar from 9pm to
midnight — you may end up (pardon the pun) jacked up.
The Mondrian throws one of Miami’s snazziest New Years Eve parties each
year. This year, partygoers can shake their bon-bons to the beats of Cuban diva Albita and Miami’s Afro-Cuban funk band, PALO! Once you
start to feel dizzy from all the reveling you can sit down and ring in
the New Year with a stomach full of Asia de Cuba’s selection of fine
cuisine presented on actions stations — that’s buffet tables for all of
you not familiar with all the different ways to describe food that you
can serve yourself.
Over at the Delano, Robin Thicke will be crooning to a crowd. A golden
ticket to this event will get you a midnight serenade by the R&B
artist and a complimentary champagne toast. In case you can’t come up
with a better way to welcome 2012 than with hot and heavy
performance by Thicke, the Delano is offering guests a four-course meal
that starts at a mere $425.
If how you spend New Years Eve is any indication of how you’ll live in
the next year, go ahead, live large for one night. But be sure to take lot of photos to keep you company during the
Ramen noodle dinners you’ll be eating every day afterward.
–Vanessa Martin
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