Sports

Dear Internet, Miami Heat Fans Are the Most Loyal in Basketball

Damn yo, don't kill the messenger! Yesterday Riptide ran an article about a new survey done by Brand Keys that claims to show that Miami Heat fans are the most loyal in the NBA -- and then the Internet proceeded to have a shit. Nearly 650 people retweeted the piece,...
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Damn yo, don’t kill the messenger! Yesterday Riptide ran an article about a new survey done by Brand Keys that claims to show that Miami Heat fans are the most loyal in the NBA — and then the Internet proceeded to have a shit. Nearly 650 people retweeted the piece, many incorrectly labeling the survey as being conducted by New Times ourselves. (Our internal polling operation consists of one old lady drinking malt liquor and shaking a Magic Eight ball.)

It’s cool though, we understand some people outside of Miami can’t read. But you just didn’t have to be soooooo mean about it! Oh, but you were, and a few of you threw around some things that needed a little fact checking. Just remember, you brought this upon yourself, Internet — don’t start none, won’t be none.

See also:

Miami Heat Fans Ranked the Most Loyal In the NBA

Fact #1 the Miami Heat averaged 19,893 fans a game this season.

Fact #2 the American Airlines Arena’s capacity is 19,600.

Fact #3 You’re a liar, and I doubt you laughed so hard your ass fell off.

https://twitter.com/klew24

Related

Click the link!!! What is wrong with you people!??!

https://twitter.com/miaminewtimes

Dwyane Wade ranks seventh in jersey sales this season, ahead of guys like Dwight Howard, Chris Paul, and Blake Griffin. There is this rumor going around that the Miami Heat have a few good players.

https://twitter.com/miaminewtimes

Related

While it’s very hot in Miami, it is not hell, quite the opposite in fact.

https://twitter.com/tenaciousmich

Since 1988, you better ask somebody playa. Werd to Grant Long, the original Udonis Haslem of this shit.

So we get it, you don’t think Heat fans are loyal, or at least the MOST loyal anyway. That’s cool though, haters gonna hate. We just thought you should know we heard you, and we laughed. Not so much with you, more so at you, but laugh we did, regardless.

Related

Hey, before you wear the crown they try to tear you down, right?

#LetsGOHeat

Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.

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