OK, men -- you earned your gold star on Valentine's Day by taking us to a surf-and-turf dinner that cost five times what you would have paid the day before or after.
Now, just a measly month later, it's time for us to, apparently, return the favor on Steak and BJ Day.
Yes, Steak and BJ Day.
True, Hallmark hasn't acknowledged it (yet), and you still have to go to work (which is probably why they call it a "job"), but this is a real holiday.
That makes the holiday legit. You have to believe everything you
read on the Internet. Plus, Steak and BJ Day has its own merchandise, just in case the steak
and BJ aren't enough and you want to give a souvenir T-shirt or a mug to take to the office.
And look -- there are greeting cards! Of course, there are always the buzzkills who don't like the holiday -- bet they'd boycott Christmas too. Detractors just make this holiday as real as Groundhog Day in our humble opinion.
premise and celebration are both pretty simple. If your guy took care of you
on Valentine's Day by giving you flowers, candy, a nice dinner, and/or a
little blue jewelry box, you must reciprocate by giving him steak and a
blow job March 14. Because, as the website
states, "Men do not want candy. Men have no need for flowers or teddy
bears. There are two things men want: steak and a blowjob."
If you want to take your man someplace special, Red the Steakhouse celebrates the occasion and recommends treating your man to a 20-ounce Kobe steak ($399) for the meaty portion of the evening. As for the rest? A rep for the restaurant said, "They're on their own."
If you're on a budget, don't fret. We're pretty certain that throwing a box of Steak-umms
in the microwave is sufficient for the steak part of the holiday. Just in case you want to go a little, um, deeper, here's a recipe for peppered New York strip steak, courtesy of Steak and BJ's website:
Peppered New York Strip Steak
This recipe is for a spiced-up New York strip steak. The secret is to use cracked, not ground, peppercorns. The solid pepper flavor is what makes this steak so great. Don't worry -- this is not as hot (spicy) as it might sound. Serves two.
2 one-inch-thick New York strip steaks
1/8 cup black peppercorns
1 1/2 tablespoons lime pepper seasoning
Salt to taste
1. Place peppercorns in mortar; coarsely crush with a pestle until most of the corns are broken (you can use a coffee grinder or food processor too).
2. Cover one side of steaks with crushed pepper and press in firmly. Sprinkle with lime pepper seasoning and salt. Turn the steaks over and repeat the same process. Place the steaks in the refrigerator for 3 hours, uncovered.
3. Heat the grill. Brush the grate with vegetable or olive oil and place steaks over the hottest part of the fire for 3 minutes. Turn the steaks over for another 3 minutes. Move the steaks to a cooler part of the grill and continue to cook until done to your liking.
4. Serve with your favorite steak sauce.
Find some handy-dandy tips for the BJ part here.
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We discovered the real origins of the holiday. (Turn the volume down if you're at the office.)