Joe Schmo’s Least Favorite Turkey Day Dishes

You made it! You’ve likely been slaving in the kitchen since last night, up early this morning to put the bird in the oven. Taking a short break to catch your breath? Nice! Just a few more hours and you can relax, stuff your face and take the best nap of your life. Ah, Thanksgiving time.

We recently went out for a little Short Order field work. Anyone and everyone we came across throughout Miami-Dade was asked to share just one thing: What is your least favorite Thanksgiving dish?

The results proved to be, well, traditional considering Thanksgiving menu staples, but Joe Schmo’s reasonings are what took the cake.

Note: some responses were omitted to avoid doubles.

Candied yams – “My mom puts too much orange juice and not enough sugar.”

Stuffing with innards – “I already have organs… I don’t need anymore inside if me.”

Mashed potatoes – “Ever since I was a kid, the mushy consistency grossed me out.”

Cranberry sauce – “Sweet ain’t supposed to go with meat!”

Mincemeat pie – “Tastes like cat food.”

Pumpkin pie – “The thought of sweet squash makes me gag.”

Creamed corn – [all she could say was] “Yuck!”

Salad – “It’s a waste of stomach space for all the other awesomeness on the table.”

Canned greenbean casserole – “It’s visually unappealing, so I wouldn’t want it in my mouth.”

Pecan pie – “My mom always used to put too much Bourbon and not cook it all the way through. She’d be wasted by her second bite.”

Brussels sprouts – “I hated the bitter taste as a kid.”

Stuffing – “It’s weird to put random $#@! in moist breadcrumbs.”

Vegan gravy – “Run for your life!”

It seems the only traditional dish that didn’t make it on the list of shame was turkey — does that mean everyone likes it? Perhaps today will determine if it’ll be on your oh-no list for next year.

Comment your least favorite picks!

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