Flotsam

Txts from Last Night: a 305 Odyssey

Don't have Twitter yet but want to make your drunken cell phone-written ramblings available to the public? Well, luckily Txts from Last Night is here. The site collects weird, user-submitted text messages from anonymous sources only identified by their area code. I don't know how you all have 305 cell phones, but Miami-Dade is well represented on the site. 


A few of our favorites: 

(305): If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette? [ed: Yes. Yes it does.]

(305): He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong. 

(305): Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough. 

(305): Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that. 

(305): I just saw a hot homeless man 

(859): I feel like death. Did you die last night?
(305): Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
(859): unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus 

(305): I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it. 

(786): Thats something to write home to mom about
(305): Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her 

(786): Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.

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Kyle Munzenrieder