- Big bust of the week: $217 million in cocaine, seized at a shipping port in Kingston.
- An eight-ball was found at the Kennedy Space Center. This is the second time in two years that cocaine has been discovered in a Nasa facility.
- A South Carolina man put crack in his crack.
- A Connecticut man was arrested after calling the police to complain that a dealer had given him subpar cocaine.
- Mike Tyson: "I always thought if you did cocaine, you'd stay skinny. I didn't know you'd turn into a fat crackhead."
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- Current estimated level of death: 72%
- Fidel Castro has 100,000 followers on his Twitter account, which just Tweets his old, boring writings.
- In the perjury trial of wannabe Castro assassin Luis Posada Carriles, a former New York Times reporter testified that he bragged of a wave of bombings in Havana.
- Fidel hearts Gadhafi.
- Heat record for the week and LeBron's PPG: 3-1, 21.5
- LeBron says he wants his hometown Ohio State Buckeyes to prevail in March Madness, but on his website chose Duke.
- An Atlanta nightclub that sued LeBron for not making an appearance for which he was paid $25,000 dropped the suit and "looks forward to a James appearance in the future."
- BREAKING: A sportswriter in Altoona really dislikes LeBron James.
- Notable Tweet: "20+ games left in phase 2. I'm ReFOCUSED! No prisoners, I have no friends when at WAR besides my Soldiers.