The NBA Finals Inspiring Local Horndogs to Look for Heat-Related Sex Online | Riptide 2.0 | Miami | Miami New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Miami, Florida
Navigation

The NBA Finals Inspiring Local Horndogs to Look for Heat-Related Sex Online

It's the playoffs. Three-peat. LeBronmania. Whatever: For horndog Miamians, the Heat games are also, apparently, the perfect opportunity to ask strangers to watch basketball. Or, you know, "watch basketball." On Craigslist, more than 30 posts from the past couple of weeks specifically mention Heat games in personal posts soliciting sex...
Share this:

It's the playoffs. Three-peat. LeBronmania. Whatever: For horndog Miamians, the Heat games are also, apparently, the perfect opportunity to ask strangers to watch basketball. Or, you know, "watch basketball."

On Craigslist, more than 30 posts from the past couple of weeks specifically mention Heat games in personal posts soliciting sex. It's not the first time the NBA Finals have set hormones raging in the Magic City. Who could forget the 2012 finals, when two South Florida porn stars made a promise: If the Heat won the series, the two women would give free blowjobs to any fans who met a few stipulations.

See also: Local Porn Stars Will Make Good on Offer to Give Anyone a BJ After Heat Championship

The pleas on Craigslist are a little less dramatic than that. Heat-related sex posts range from the tactful ("Let's watch the Heat game and turn up the heat!") to the, well, not ("Looking to suck young dick after the Heat game").

We've culled something of a representative sample.

Many posts, such as this one, were fairly direct. Let's watch the game; "I'll bring the party favors."

Others went with the classic, subtle quid pro quo: You're a woman; I've got basketball tickets...

Even though the Heat are the best sports team ever, sometimes they still lose, and that's hard on Craigslisters. Some posts, like this one, sought consolation in defeat:

Other posts just laid it all out there. Because this is Craigslist, right? Why mess around?

This Heat fan wanted to meet another Heat fan. But no bellies and no chubs, please.

I really don't know what's going on here. A bet, where if you lose, you have to do what? And if you win, you have to do what?

And then there was this one. Heads up, Dania Beach Heat fans...

Send your tips to [email protected], or follow @trevorbach.

Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.

BEFORE YOU GO...
Can you help us continue to share our stories? Since the beginning, Miami New Times has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami — and we'd like to keep it that way. Our members allow us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls.