The Miami Dolphins have officially been eliminated from the NFL playoffs. Merry Christmas! You've already known for weeks what the Dolphins were going to get you, though. They aren't very good at surprises.
One of the least likable, most useless, totally unmemorable Dolphins teams will mercifully be laid to rest next weekend after 60 minutes of meaningless football against the Buffalo Bills on New Year's Eve. Honestly, if you're planning to attend the game for any reason beyond tailgating, you deserve a medal and your name in the Dolphins Ring of Honor. You also deserve a scolding from a family member, because you're apparently really bad with money.
The Dolphins' 29-13 loss to the Kansas City Chiefs this past Sunday was much of the same of which fans have endured all season: uninspired quarterback play from Jay Cutler, subpar defense, and overall mediocre football nobody would have missed if it didn't happen. The Chiefs were bad, but the Dolphins were worse. It wasn't fun to watch. Thankfully, Dolphins fans will see their Sundays clear up just in time for 2018.
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SHOW ME HOW
The Miami Dolphins have officially been eliminated from the playoffs. pic.twitter.com/0IeJDOdKc2— NFL on ESPN (@ESPNNFL) December 24, 2017
For the Dolphins, this offseason will be an interesting one. The team will likely give Adam Gase at least one more year to prove he's the offensive guru he was sold to fans as. It's also likely that bad-at-picking-football-players Mike Tannenbaum will continue to pick players for the Dolphins.
When the Fins take the field next season, the team could look completely different: They might choose to let someone else pay Jarvis Landry in free agency, release Ndamukong Suh, and, let's hope, have a healthy Ryan Tannehill back under center. Those are the main pieces; the filler on the roster will probably change considerably. The Dolphins are a bad football team full of bad football players. They'll have all offseason to fix that, or we'll be in this same position next season.
For now, though, the Dolphins are just about done playing football. And that's the best news fans have heard in months.