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Now he'll have some time to find those WMDs himself

Bush sat down to lunch with the San Francisco woman who'll have his nuts in a legislative vise for the next two years. Donald Rumsfeld waved a pouty goodbye. Dick Cheney was described as "glum" in the New York Times.

Reading good news in the paper felt about as odd and unfamiliar as this morning's chilly autumn air.

Unexpected lessons of the day:

Number of dead soldiers required to make the country forget about butt-fucking and fetuses: 2,839

State you can count on: Virginia

Numbers of years waited under George W. Bush for good news: 6

Power of Prayer: exists

Democracy: works (eventually)

-Calvin Godfrey