In a video posted on its official Facebook page, the school proudly announced a new major focus in Miami studies, or, as it's officially termed, the "305 Til I Die" degree.
New major at FIUA new major is coming to FIU this summer! Read more: http://bit.ly/1UIaCly
Posted by Florida International University on Friday, April 1, 2016
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But there's always room for improvement in a new and growing major.
Allow us to make a few suggestions for an expanded curriculum:
- Financial planning from the diamond princess herself, Professor Trina.
- Experimental theories in how to defy gravity, taught by local plastic surgeons.
- Basic local geography taught by anyone besides LeBron "Taking My Talents to South Beach" James.
- Fiction by Rick Ross.
- "Getting Ahead Without Doing Much Work" by Marco Rubio (he needs a job anyway).
- Free Speech 101 by Uncle Luke.
- A class in how to deal with common local legal problems, like when your neighbor leaves dead roosters in your yard or when your wife owes money to a
male stripper, taught by Telemundo courtroom show Caso Cerrado host Ana Maria Polo. - "Planning for Your Future" with Walter Mercado.