Publix Brawl Over Chicken Wings Caught on Camera

A lot of weird things happen every week in Florida, and on Friday we're here to wrap up the weirdest. This week's stories include a brawl in the pride of Florida, two criminals who were stupid in the exact same way, and, depending upon your opinion, a raccoon that is either cute or terrifying. 

Publix Brawl Caught on Camera 

We've joked before that Publix is the pride of Florida. It's the one thing on which Floridians of all stripes can agree. In Publix we trust, God bless. 

Unfortunately, this being Florida, there are bound to be some downright WTF-Florida-worthy shenanigans that occur from time to time in our favorite supermarket, and this week, a brawl over rotisserie chicken at a Tampa Publix was caught on camera. 

The incident went down September 16 at a Publix in the Tampa suburb of Temple Terrace. According to WFLA, the incident began when a costumer ordering chicken wings from the deli threw a racial slur at an employee. It's not exactly clear what happened after that, but somehow it led to the video above.

Our favorite participant is the white lady who takes off her chanx and slaps people with them. 

Nobody was injured, but at least one person was arrested for simple battery. 

Two Separate Florida Incidents, Same Florida Lesson: If You Steal Something From a Store, Do Not Try to Return It 

Here's a basic criminal rule: If you steal something from a store, don't try to return it at that store to make money off of what you stole. Two men learned that lesson this week in Florida. 

First up is Richard D. Morgan of Alabama. He stole a lottery-ticket dispenser from a liquor store in Esto, Florida. Naturally, the lottery department was informed and voided all winning scratch-off tickets in the machine. However, the morning after the theft, Morgan visited the same store and tried to claim winnings from one of the tickets he stole. Using the power of common sense, a store clerk figured out Morgan might have been the guy who stole the machine, and Morgan later confessed to the crime

Meanwhile, in Ocala, Jose Daniel Claudio Jr. stole a car speaker amplifier off the shelf of a pawnshop, pealed off the sale sticker, and then, without even leaving the store, repawned it for $60. Claudio might have gotten away with it, but the next day he returned to the store and straight-up stole a $250 leaf blower. The store notified police, and Claudio was nabbed. He admitted he was trying to use money from the thefts to fuel his heroin addiction. 

Raccoon Begs for Food

Because we get tired of chronicling Florida human terribleness in this column, here's a tale of Florida animal cuteness — unless you think raccoons are gross, in which, case, uh, *trigger warning*. Anyway, Rocksy the Raccoon of Sarasota has figured out how to beg for food, which is either adorable or an omen of an imminent raccoon rebellion. 
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Kyle Munzenrieder