Miami Heat Crying Controversy: Erik Spoelstra Needs to Shut His Damn Mouth

The Heat racked up their fourth loss in a row last night, a sorry streak made all the more troubling that they came against other likely playoff bound teams. You'd think the shame factor from the losses alone would be enough, but, oh no, here comes Erik Spoelstra, a goofy-faced 12-year-old Muppet that Pat Riley, best we can tell, was forced to make coach after a night of regrettable drinking and wagers, to inform the press that members of his team were crying in the locker room. Boom! Media explosion! Haters' hallelujahs! Laughing-stalk of the NBA! Way to go, Spo!

"This is painful for every single one of us going through this," Spoelstra said at the post-game presser. "There are couple of guys crying right now in the locker room. It's not a matter of want. It's a matter of doing."

Chris Joseph touched on this in the morning, but things have only gotten worse. A search for "Heat Cry" on Google news now brings up 1384 articles. The line has become a lazy headline writers dream:

Now comes news that

Amar'e Stoudemire and Carmelo Anthony were laughing at the reported tears. We doubt they're the only players in the league giggling.

Spoelstra's comments come just a few days after some in the peanut gallery were laughing over the prospect that Chris Bosh may or may not have shed a tear after a loss to the Magic.

We know Spoelstra was just trying to illustrate how much his player's have their heart in this game, but there are two very important rules in sports:

  1. There is no crying in sports.
  2. If you see a team member crying, you take that secret to your grave.
Lock those lips Erik. Besides, we still can't shake the feeling that you're the reason the players have something to cry about in the first place.

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Kyle Munzenrieder