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Oh, those poor young Miami Republicans with dreams of D.C. Unless they launch a long-shot Senate campaign against a popular governor, they’ll have to wait for Ileana Ros-Lehtinen and the Diaz-Balarts to decide they’ve had enough of doing whatever it is they do with their congressional seats. (Seriously, what is it they do besides make a speech about Castro every once in a while and vote for “government waste”?)
Well, Armando Gutierrez Jr. seems as tired of waiting, almost as tired as he is of hearing Alan Grayson’s crazy mouth flap, so the 28-year-old Miami native will move to Orlando to take on Grayson.
Gutierrez has lived in Miami all of his life, but says he’s qualified to represent the people of Central Florida. Why? “Gutierrez said he owns seven commercial and retail properties in the Lakeland area.” Oh, of course.
If elected, let’s hope he will work swiftly to make sure people die quickly, and that bacon is banned once and for all.
Gutierrez, a University of Miami grad who also holds degrees from Harvard and the Wharton School of Business, is a local developer, cofounder of Conglomerate.com, and a former trustee of Jackson Memorial. He has also become a major Republican fundraiser at a young age.
Of course, he has a rich daddy — Armando Gutierrez Sr., the super-rich enterpeneur who’s found himself in the middle of some of Miami’s biggest political sagas, including the Elián González affair and the 2000 recount.