Miami Beach Looking for Corporate Sugar Daddies

​So, Miami Beach is officially on the street corner with a leg out hoping for a big corporate sugar daddy to send a little money its way in exchange for a few favors. According to The Herald, the Miami Beach commission unanimously approved a contract with the Superlative Group, a marketing company. 

The deal could lead to all sorts of corporate cross-promotions like naming rights, exclusive deals, and branded products. 

Here's some of our humble propositions: 

  • Lincoln Town Car Road
  • A branded line of easily removable bikini tops
  • LMFAO's "I'm in Miami Bitch" Convention Center
  • Flamingo Park sponsored by ManHunt.Com
  • Miami Beach Coke, a retro formulation of the cola with the original cocaine ingredients
  • Ocean Drive Drive
  • Threatening SoBe Iced Teas to start paying royalties
  • Normandy Bramen Motors Isles
  • Naming Speedo the official clothing sponsor of the 12th Street Beach, if they aren't already 
  • Pastel crock pots and tubs
  • A Rosetta Stone language program for Miami Beesh "English"
  • A South Beach Snuggie made of fishnet 
Any other suggestions? 

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Kyle Munzenrieder