4

Miami Beach Cop Blames Boner Cream for Positive Cocaine Test

If there was one American city where accidentally getting cocaine into your system without your knowledge would be a somewhat common occurrence, it is Miami. After all, back in 2009 French Tennis player Richard Gasquet was suspended after a bit of coke turned up in his system. He claimed that it entered his body because he made out with a coked-up woman at LIV, and his suspension was lifted.

Miami Beach Police Detective Reinaldo Casas excuse for failing a cocaine test is even better. He claims it entered his body because he was using some questionable boner cream.

See also: Miami Beach Cop Blames "Sexual Aid Cream" for Firing

Continue Reading

Casas, a respected homicide detective was fired in February 2013 after coke showed up in his system. Casas maintained that he had never even done coke.

He soon realized that cocaine might have gotten in some weird sex jelly he got from a friend who in turn got it from "an old Cuban guy." The friend said he got the cream, stored in an unmarked container, as a gift from the guy in exchange for political signs.

Casas appealed the firing, and convinced an arbitrator this week that indeed the accidental coke consumption wasn't grounds for firing. Now MBPD must hire him back.

Though, this begs the question: does rubbing coke jelly on your dick actually enhance sex?

Would you be surprised to know there's not much in the way of scientific evidence on this matter?

The best we can do is this explanation from a drug message board:

Cocaine probably doesn't make you very high by applying it to the penis. The main effect would be to anesthetize the skin, meaning one could have sex for longer without ejaculating.

To which another user responds:

What a waste of coke... for gods sake, keep your doodle out of the drugs.

The forum could not come to a conclusion as to what the coke cream would do to the detectives' partners, uh, sugar walls. Yet another reason to always use a condom.

Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.

Newsletters

All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories
    Send: