Audio By Carbonatix
On Tuesday, LeBron James released a freestyle rap. Last night, he released the frickin’ kraken on the entire Bucks’ buttocks. On numerous occasions in the first half, LeBron unleashed some of the best dunks you will see all year, flying, reversing, and tomahawking his way to the rim seemingly whenever he desired. During one of the dunks, he peeled off his shirt midair and took a selfie. OK, that didn’t happen — he didn’t take off his shirt.
The best dunk featured LeBron taking flight for what felt like five minutes and then landing his aircraft directly on Edke Udoh’s airstrip. Edke Udoh is a person; he probably doesn’t like things landing on his face.
Later, LeBron toyed with the Bucks further, sparing them no mercy when they seemingly surrendered midway through his assault. Sorry, Bucks, the rules of war do not apply here. It’s murder-death-kill on a mother-bleeping deer.
We’re thankful for you. Are you thankful for us?
We feel thankful for our staff and for the privilege of fulfilling our mission to be an unparalleled source of information and insight in Miami. We’re aiming to raise $30,000 by December 31, so we can continue covering what matters most to this community.
Help us continue giving back to Miami.
The Milwaukee Bucks are the worst team in basketball, a truly amazing feat considering the Philadelphia 76ers lost 26 games in a row at one point this season, so you expected an easy ride in this one. But with this Heat team, “easy ride” usually means “flying death machine that secretes Sports Center highlights.”
Aside from LeBron’s monster throwdowns, the rest of Wednesday’s 96-77 blowout didn’t disappoint.
Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.
