Opinion

Does Ron DeSantis Possess BDE? A New Times Investigation

Ron DeSantis, B.D.
Ron DeSantis, B.D. Photo by Joe Raedle via Getty Images
Republican Arizona gubernatorial candidate Kari Lake has made headlines this year as a prominent election denier. It has now become apparent that she's anything but an erection denier.

On Sunday, during a rally in downtown Phoenix that featured an appearance from GOP idol du jour Ron DeSantis, Lake praised the Florida governor, describing him as "gutsy." Pretending to search for the most fitting way to characterize DeSantis, Lake, former Phoenix TV news anchor turned far-right candidate for her state's highest office, continued, "The guy has bigger... Wait, let me think about how I want to word this. My staff always says, ‘Whatever you do, do not say "balls."' So I'm not going to say it. That guy has a backbone made of steel."

She wasn't finished.

"I'll tell you what he's got. I don't know if you've heard of this, but he's got the B-D-E," Lake went on. "Anybody know what that means? Ask your kids about it later. I call it 'Big DeSantis Energy.' Right? He's got the same kind of BDE that President Trump has."
New Times had never heard of Big DeSantis Energy.

Some of us, however, are familiar with BDE, which in popular parlance stands for "Big Dick Energy." (Kids today, right?!) It's a term that describes a person who's confident, but not cocky. Urban Dictionary sums it up as "the loud and boisterous energy emitted by someone who has a colossal phallus and doesn't have to tell anyone about it.... People with big dick energy possess qualities such as leadership, kindness, positivity towards others, great humor, and a 'don't fuck with me' aura. Great hair too."

Dunno about y'all, but to our ears, none of that screams "Ron DeSantis" — a man who has been variously described as a "mini-Trump" and a "smug asshole" and has earned headlines for yelling at kids, for heaven's sake.

Perhaps not surprisingly, many on social media were quick to disagree with Lake's assessment of the governor's putative dimensions.

"Tell me you don't know what real BDE is without telling me you don't know what real BDE is," quipped Atlantic contributing writer Jemele Hill.
 "Ron is the kind of governor you want to Netflix and chill with, right? It's political cuffing season, y'all. OnlyFans of Ron DeSantis in this party! Can I get a vibe check??" suggested Tommy Vietor, who served as a spokesperson for President Obama and cofounded Crooked Media.
Perhaps most aptly, conservative columnist Christian Schneider offered: "Thomas Jefferson just emerged from his grave and admitted maybe this whole America thing was a mistake."
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Alex DeLuca is a staff writer at Miami New Times.
Contact: Alex DeLuca