Jimmy Johnson Shilling for Male Enhancement Pills

Jimmy Johnson's little Jimmy feels amazing, and he wants you all to know about it.

The former Miami Dolphins and Hurricanes coach (who also coached for some team somewhere in Texas) has signed on to be the new spokesman for ExtenZe, a line of "male enhancement" pills, as the company tries to take the product mainstream.

Basically you're going to see Johnson talk about his johnson and making all sorts of unfortunate euphemisms on your TV for a while now. ExtenZe wants you to believe their herbal pills will make you manhood bigger, but never actually makes those claims, and instead promises to prolong your enjoyment, energy, virility.

"Most men want to perform the best they can in just about everything. Isn't that why we buy the biggest and best of everything?" Jimmy says in one ad, before signing off with "Go long with ExtenZe. I do."

The company tells Ad Age that Johnson was the perfect choice because he could pull the ad off with out embarrassment, get the company mainstream notice, and appeal to minorities and women. The fact that both his first and last name are common slang terms for the product's area of concern is just an added bonus.

KEEP MIAMI NEW TIMES FREE... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Kyle Munzenrieder