“Ike Slaps South Florida” and Other Dingbat Headlines

Hurricanes often have geeky names. Gustav was a loser for sure. Back in 1989, Hugo sounded like a kid who’d get beat up on the playground. There was Iris in 2001 — want to go bowling? And Georges in 1998. What in God’s name is up with that ‘s’? Check out the list of retired hurricane names on the National Hurricane Center site.

Ike is manly, though. Riptide’s been thinking of headlines lately: “Ike Slaps South Florida.” Or maybe “Ike invades the Bay of Pigs” (He’s the one that really greenlighted the damn thing, you know.)

Batten down your hatches and start thinking, kid, because all projections for this baby are leading our way.

— Chuck Strouse