It's one thing to get obliterated by the Miami Heat's Big Three and their skull crushing offense. But when they rock an opponent's face off with some suffocating defense, well then you really got something.
The Heat used their smothering D, combined with their usual badass O and took down the visiting Philadelphia 76ers last night 94-73 in Game 2 of the first round of the NBA Playoffs.
Miami now heads into the City of Brotherly Love And Battery Throwing with a 2-0 series lead.
How stifling was the Heat defense?
No 76er scored more than 18 points, that's how.
LeBron James, Chris Bosh and Dwyane Wade all outscored the entire 76ers team in the first half. Miami forced Philly to shoot just 26 percent from the floor, which we're too lazy to look up, but pretty sure is a Miami Heat playoff record.
Miami's defense held the 76ers' starters to just 9 points in the first half. By the time a 76er got into double digit scoring, the game was well into the third quarter and well out of reach while all the rich frontrunner assholes who buy the good lower level seats were leaving for their limos and hovercrafts to beat the traffic.
Unlike in Game 1, the Heat didn't dick around. They came out firing, making damn sure the 76ers wouldn't jump to a 16-point lead like they did on Saturday.
As for the offense, LeBron James continues to
prove the naysayers right showing what a choker he is beat the ever living crap out of playoff opponents with a 29 point, 7 rebound, 6 assist night. Chris Bosh, meanwhile, continued to show how soft and delicate he is make the 76ers big men his own personal hand puppets with his second-straight double-double (21 points, 11 rebounds).
As for D-Wade, he was hampered by migraine headaches and was questionable to play. But obviously D-Wade told his migraine to quit being a dick for two hours so he could unleash his awesomeness all over the AmericanAirlines Arena, because he finished the night with 14 points. Yes, D-Wade can will migraines into submission. That's not us talking, that's science!
The only time the 76ers came within making a dent was midway through the second quarter. The Heat offense hit a bit of a drought, and Philadelphia capitalized with a mini-run cutting Miami's lead to 28-20.
But LeBron James is nicknamed King James for a reason. Led by James, the Heat responded with a 21-11 run of their own, capitalized by the first Fuck You! dunk of these playoffs (see video below).
The run and dunk was ignited by none other than The Warden himself. Joel Anthony denied two shot attempts by Philly, which led to Mario Chalmers throwing the alley oop to James, who flushed it down with one hand, let out a primal scream, and made an anaconda face. Awesome? Awesome.
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Joel Anthony once won a staring contest with his own reflection. True story!
Game 3 is at Philadelphia on Thursday. Tip off is at 8:00 p.m.