How strong is God's Power?
Tough enough to take down both Hitler and Stalin? Tenacious enough to defeat the villainous X'Zavier Bloodsaw? Brave enough to destroy Dr. Speedy Nutz?
America will soon find out. Miami may not have any college basketball teams in March Madness, but it does have a powerhouse reppin' the 305 in another bracket: the annual Name of the Year contest, a wildly popular Internet-voting showdown among 64 of the best real names of real people.
God's Power Offor, a junior and talented defensive end at Hialeah's American High School, snagged a one seed in this year's NOTY bracket, setting up the Nigerian-born local for a run into nomenclature history.
"How can you not like G.P.'s chances?" says Stw, the blogger behind the Name of the Year bracket, who asks to remain anonymous so as not to endanger his day job.
Offor's father, Justice, had a vision that his son's birth was evidence of God's power and should be named accordingly, he told Sports Illustrated reporter Andy Staples last summer.
But when the family moved to Miami, a moniker that had been cool in Nigeria -- a nation where the president is Goodluck Jonathan -- was suddenly a source of devastating mockery. "I would get bullied. I would get picked on," Offor told Staples. "It was hell being named that."
The abuse was so bad that Offor's mom, Nma, filed paperwork to change his name to David, Staples reports. But after they thought it over, God's Power stuck.
Thank the Lord.
Offor has already proven himself on the football field -- the six-foot-two, 220-pound teen earned a coveted mention as a "rising" prospect in the Miami Herald. But now God's Power has the fight of his life on his hands.
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The top seed will face two foes named for genocidal dictators -- Stalin Felipe, a Hofstra University student, and Hitler Makofane, a South African soccer player. There's Dinero Fudge, a student in Milwaukee, and Nubian Peak, a Virginia footballer.
There's Nohjay Nimpson (a triple jumper at Saint Joseph's University), Spontaneous Gordon (a car crash survivor in Delaware), and Just-In'Love Smith (a Sienna basketball player), the other three top seeds. And don't overlook underrated dark horses such as midlevel exec Rich Tanguy, Pennsylvanian Roy Spancake, and the dreaded Dr. Speedy Nutz, a California dentist.
Offor's first task is dispatching 16-seeded Spiral Lightninghawk, a shoplifter arrested in Minneapolis. Stw is putting money on divine intervention by God's Power.
"If G.P. can get past a likely match-up with New York photographer Coke Wisdom O'Neal," he says, "I think he's a shoo-in for the Final Four."