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Fruit Loopy

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On August 13 the Miami Herald printed the regular weekly column by contributor Glenn Terry of Coconut Grove. In that week's edition of "The Grove Guy," Terry voiced his obsessive disapproval of the Grove's new bus benches (the main objection being that humans can't lie down on them, though The Bitch, a frequent public transportation user, rarely becomes so drowsy she feels she must nap while awaiting the diesel coaches). Terry also advocated his plan for ending local hunger -- planting fruit trees in parks.

"Imagine going to Kennedy Park, for instance, to pick free avocados, mangos, and key limes," he wrote. "Wouldn't that be great?"

The Bitch is all for feeding the humans and so on, but the only kind of begging for food she wants to see at the South Bayshore Drive park is that of her four-footed brethren. When The Bitch asked Terry about his scheme, he said, "Fruit trees in the park is a great idea ... I'm getting hungry just thinking about it."

Terry added that his vision quest hasn't been met with the hoped-for enthusiasm. He says Miami city commissioners have reacted to it by pointing out that maintenance of the trees would cause problems and that the trees' fruits would be a huge, rotting mess, not a source of sustenance.

District 2 Commissioner Linda Haskins said she feared the presence of the fruit trees would create additional work for the city's maintenance crews.

"I think those are lame reasons for not trying out a good idea," Terry says.

Taking matters into his own hands, Terry and his son have begun planting papaya trees throughout his neighborhood on the Grove's south side. Terry says some startled fruit tree recipients have nicknamed the teenage John Terry "Johnny Papaya."-as told to Jean Carey

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